Temptations
by TiraMeDeCama
Summary: Amaro's wife is away on tour in Iraq as tension begins to build between Amaro and Rollins. Will he remain faithful or give in to a blond haired temptation? Rollaro. Rated M for language and future content.
1. Chapter 1

**New Rollaro! You're welcome **

**So this fic takes place during season 13 before Amaro's wife comes home from Iraq. I know it's totally out of character for Amaro but I thought it would be a fun story for y'all to enjoy. Let me know what you think and FYI Rollaro will have a slow start but bear with me please. I'm also open to ideas.**

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Amanda had just gotten home from a long, brutal day at work. Her dark, quiet, and semi-depressing apartment usually provided her comfort after long days but after a day like today, she couldn't wait to tear off her work clothes and put on her running gear. She definitely needed to get oxygen flowing through her body. The detectives in her unit had all spent the better part of the week on a particularly difficult "he said, she said" case. And as usual, she and Amaro had disagreed, sometimes it seemed like he purposely disagreed with her. They both had a temper and their difference of opinion on everything was the fuel that ignited their arguments.

_After four straight days of arguing about whether or not a young woman was raped, TARU sent Rollins the evidence that supported the man's version of the story. Usually, Amaro didn't gloat, but today he gloated and it made her anger flare from deep within her gut, little by little he was getting under her skin and she didn't like it one bit. The rest of the squad was tired of hearing them argue, she was sure of it. He looked at her with a big, teasing grin and shrugged. Then she lost it._

Amanda started off on a light jog with Frannie but the more she thought about her argument with Amaro the faster she ran and within a few minutes she was in a full sprint trying to outrun her anger and the memory of their harsh and hurtful argument.

_After hearing Amaro gloat she tossed the file in her hand at him and yelled, "Go fuck yourself!" before storming off into the cribs. He followed her in there and deliberately picked at her._

"_Rollins, go back to Atlanta with the rest of your slow-minded kind. You're not cut out to work with the big guys."_

"_The only thing big about you is your head, Amaro. Fuck off!"_

"_It's clear I'm the smarter detective here because clearly I have two big heads." _

_She slapped at his two raised fingers, "Go fuck yourself until your wife comes back or is she in no rush because she's getting hers out there?" Amanda took a cheap shot and she knew it, a few weeks ago she overheard Amaro arguing with his wife about another man. She wasn't sure of the details or if his wife was even cheating but she knew it would hurt him._

"_Don't talk about my marriage." _

_She knew she hit a nerve by the anger that appeared in his eyes, "What marriage? You call living in two different countries and Skyping once in a while a marriage? Face it, Amaro, if your wife wanted a marriage she never would have accepted that second tour." She spat at him._

"_You're being a bitch right now. I liked "Amanda the gambling trailer trash" better. At least then I knew I could throw money at you and you'd shut the fuck up!"_

_She noticed his clenched jaw and his clenched fists, "Aw, did I hit a nerve, baby?" She held out her arms, "What? You wanna hit me? Huh? Hit me like your father hit your mother?"_

"_Stop." He told her sternly._

_She pushed him back into the wall, "Hit me! You know you want to! You know what they say about little boys who see their daddy's beatin' on their mommy's."_

_Cragen walked into the cribs just as Amanda pushed Nick again, "That's enough! The whole damn squad room can hear you two. Kill each other when you're not at work!"_

_Amanda backed away from Nick, "Sorry Cap, but I have the urge to puke from disgust. I need to head home." _

_On her way out she heard Cragen ask Amaro, "What the hell was that?"_

"_Nothin'" She heard Amaro snap back._

Amanda kept running until her side ached, she slowed down to a jog to give herself and Frannie a chance to catch her breath.

_She regretted the name calling and bringing up his personal life but his insults had hurt her. She wanted to hurt him too. The last couple of months they had been at each other's throats constantly. She didn't know what changed to make them act that way towards each other. It bothered her how easy life was for him. Success seemed to seek him out, whereas she had to chase success and once she felt she could grasp it, it was pulled even further from her. Nick smiled and life bent over backwards for him. He had to be honest and do everything the right way. He was a perfectionist and he made it look effortless, she hated that about him. He was like Prince Charming straight out of a fairytale, she grew up thinking men like Prince Charming didn't exist, but as if Prince Charming wasn't good enough, Nick had to be St. Prince Charming, even escorting his mother to Sunday Mass. She needed to see some of his flaws to know he was real and imperfect like she was. And making him lose his temper was the only way she could see that he wasn't perfect._

Amanda ran back home, fed Frannie, showered and headed to the bar. She needed many stiff drinks and few good hands.

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Nick headed to gym right after Rollins had stormed out of the cribs. Anger was still burning through him and he needed a release, a positive release. He gloved up and took it out on the punching bag, he didn't think about anything, he punched the shit out the bag and didn't stop until well after an hour when his arms felt like cement bricks. He sat on the leg press to catch his breath and pull off his gloves.

His head felt a lot better and he definitely felt less angry but then his thoughts wandered back to the root of his anger. He clenched his jaw and remembered how Rollins's words hit him in the gut. He was so angry with her back in the cribs he remembered how loud and fast his heart pounded in his ears. He remembered trying to calm himself down and not give her the satisfaction of seeing him lose control.

At first, he meant for the gloating to be more of joke to get her to laugh and let go of some of the anger, he could tell she had been much angrier than usual. But Amanda didn't take it how he hoped. He followed her into the cribs with the intentions of making things better; he tried another joke that obviously didn't land. Nick just wanted to see her laugh after the week they all just had, a joke usually made everything better.

He pressed down slowly on the iron weights beneath his feet, the more he thought about Rollins the angrier he got, the angrier he got the faster he pushed down the on press plate and his thoughts turned from Rollins to Maria. His legs and thighs burned from the quick reps, Nick jumped off the leg press. He kicked and hit the punching bag with his bare hands. He stopped only when he was spent and the blood from his knuckles was smeared on the bag. He was angry with Maria for accepting the second tour in Iraq and angrier with himself for allowing her to take that tour. He should have asked her not to go but he expected her to realize she should be home with their family and take an assignment in New York. Rollins was right, his marriage was in the gutter, and he and Maria couldn't even manage to have a conversation. The times they were able to get a hold of each other on Skype or on the phone all they did was disagree and fight and the few times they managed to get along one of them would get called back to work. Maria had been gone for a year already and she still had another eight months to go.

Nick drove home and peeled off his drenched tank top and workout pants, he stood under the steaming hot shower and thought back to the last time he had made love to his wife. It had been so long, he missed her touch, her scent, her warm and moist core. He stood in the shower feeling pathetic as he pleasured himself; he was a 36 year old man that had to jerk off for the last year because his wife chose to be thousands of miles away.

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The weeks following their argument were full of tension. Cragen and the other detectives felt it as well, it didn't go unnoticed how Nick and Amanda seemed to avoid each other at all costs. Fed up with their childish behavior, Cragen made them squash it and apologize to each other in front of the squad. And out of respect to their Captain the two were civil and worked together, but not happily. Still, the tension lingered, they wouldn't exchange words or pleasantries. Olivia tried to talk to Nick about it but he brushed her off and insisted he and Rollins were over it. Fin tried to talk to Amanda but she reminded her partner that she and Nick squashed it in front of everyone.

Two months later, Amanda was again complaining about "The Asshole" from work. As usual, her friends listened to her vent and tried to offer advice but Amanda wouldn't hear of any peacemaking. She insisted the asshole was a selfish, stubborn jerk that resembled and behaved like a caveman.

Amanda's friend, Ashley, had been sitting back listening to Amanda vent and it finally hit her.

"Amanda" she said excitedly, "I've got it!"

"What?" Amanda looked at her with confusion.

"You need to fuck his brains out!" Ashley laughed.

"Whoa, that's not happening, he's married."

"Then you just need to go get laid, girl, because this guy has you all wound up!"

"Yeah!" Her friends agreed.

"Come with me next week to Frank's basketball game, the guys on his team are hot! After the game, we'll grab some drinks and introduce you to some of the guys; you can take your pick and release that tension you've been holding onto."

"I'm up for a basketball game but don't expect me to hook up with one of Frank's friends. I'm not that desperate." She joked.

Later on, once Amanda was home and getting ready for bed she was found herself thinking about what Ashley said about Nick. She chuckled to herself and quickly brushed that thought away. Sure, she thought Nick was good looking but he was married with a kid, and therefore, off limits. So she never really allowed herself to think about him in any way other than the macho, stubborn, overconfident prick from work. She thought it was funny how the word married was the first thing that popped into her mind when she thought about him considering she had never actually seen or met his wife and now that she thought about it, he never talked about his wife either. She only knew he had a daughter because she overheard him telling Olivia about her first day of kindergarten.

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The following weekend Amanda was on call but she still agreed to go with Ashley to the basketball game. She wasn't too thrilled though because it wasn't on any of the lists. What fun is a game if you can't bet on it? On the cab ride over to the game she started feeling a little guilty about how much she had been gambling lately, she was in the hole quite a bit and she knew she should stop and just pay what she owed. But that itch was just so darn itchy these days. Amanda calmed her own nerves by telling herself she would stop after she won enough to pay her debt.

She met up with Ashley in front of the park and followed her into the caged basketball court. "We're sitting over here," Ashley motioned to the other side of the bleachers, "Girl, these guys are so hot, don't let them see you drool!"

Amanda chuckled at how excited Ashley was about how hot these guys were. Amanda absolutely enjoyed men but Ashley was the man crazy one. Frank was her third boyfriend in the year she had known her.

Amanda sat down next to her friend and laughed when Ashley looked at her and giggled excitedly, "Oh yeah, it's street ball so they do the whole shirts and skins thing."


	2. Chapter 2

Amanda and her friend exchanged giggles before Amanda gave in to the temptation of checking out the glistening, muscular bodies that were out on the court. She quickly spotted Frank and watched him high five a guy whose face Amanda couldn't see. Then her eyes caught a red hat fly past them with the ball and sink a 3 pointer, his team caught the rebound and quickly passed it back to the red hat. Amanda watched his hands and feet as they moved quickly around the court, the dude had great ball handling skills and she watched as the ball left the long fingers and sunk into the net with a perfect swish. Amanda was excited, she clapped and whistled, and then she scrunched up her face as she remembered this game had no bets. If it did, she would've put her money on that guy. Her eyes scanned the court and found the ball again as she watched it get passed around the court.

"So what do ya think?" Ashley asked with excited eyes.

"Some of those guys are awesome ballers! I wished they played for the Knicks so I can bet on them!" She laughed and lightly hit Ashley's arm.

Ashley looked at her with a confused but disappointed look, "Ash, I'm kidding! I can't make a joke about betting?"

"Promise you're not gambling again?"

"What? Yeah… lighten up, huh?" Amanda turned her attention back to the game, she found the only red ball cap out on the court and for the first time she allowed her eyes to look at the man. He stood on the sidelines with his hands on his hips, his chest heaved as he tried to catch his breath, and sweat glistened over his tanned muscular body. Amanda licked her lips as she noticed how cut up his back muscles were, his lower to mid back lats formed a perfect V, she looked down to his ass and noticed his gray basketball shorts were sweat soaked just above his ass, "_Damn_" she thought and bit down on her lip. His ass was nice and she was tempted to bite it. The man turned around and her jaw slightly dropped as she noticed his abs, obliques, and his hips that trailed down to the black band of his Calvin Klein underwear. She checked out the bulge in his shorts, "_Damn, he's packin'_" she smiled to herself, her eyes wandered up to his chiseled chest, he had very light chest hair that was barely noticeable, his arm muscles were cut and defined with swollen veins. Amanda felt herself get a little woozy, this man was undeniably sexy. After a few more moments of gawking at his body she looked at his face, she stared at him with a look of shock; she recognized that chiseled jaw, soft lips and those chocolate browns that locked into her ocean blues.

"Shit." Amanda whispered to herself. Nick gazed back at her with a confused look and in an instant he broke their gaze as he went back in the game.

"Ohh, girl. Don't get too excited over that one, he's married and won't even look at another woman." Ashley patted her back gently.

"That asshole!"

"I know, I know. Why would a guy that hot get married?" Ashley shook her head like she actually believed it was a shame. "These chicks are always flirting and throwing themselves at him even though he always turns them down. He's nice about it, though."

Amanda's eyes went back to his body, she couldn't look away. "That fucker…" Amanda said under her breath. _Where the hell has he been hiding all that?_ She thought to herself. Nick turned back and looked in her direction; she felt her face turn bright red.

"Well at least he respects his wife and doesn't mess around on her. Frank told me his wife's kinda bitchy."

"That's too bad. But, hey, I gotta get going."

"You just got here…"

"Yeah, I know. But the thing is I know who he is and I don't feel comfortable being here."

"You know him? Then stay and get drinks with us afterwards."

"That's probably not a good idea…"

"C'mon Amanda! You never come out anymore…How do you even know him?"

"He's the asshole from work!"

"What? Are you serious?" Ashley laughed and shook her head. "There's no way he can be an asshole, Nick is such a nice guy! Wait 'til Frank hears this!"

"No, Ash. Don't tell Frank! I don't want Nick to know I complain about him." Amanda reached out and hugged Ashley, "I gotta go, girl."

"You suck, Amanda!" Ashley yelled at her as she stepped off the bleachers.

Before Amanda left the basketball court she glanced back and found the red hat, he was looking in the direction where she had been and clearly not paying attention to the game otherwise he would have seen that elbow coming at him.

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Nick arrived at work early the following Monday morning hoping to catch Amanda before everyone else got there.

"Ouch!" Fin chuckled as Nick walked into the squad room. "What the hell happened?"

"Playin' ball and caught an elbow." Nick smiled.

"You'd think a black eye would ruin your pretty face but it just makes you look like a tough, pretty dude." Fin laughed at his own joke as Liv walked in and stopped to question Nick about his eye.

"It looks worse than it is." He said as he pushed Liv's hands away.

"Did you even ice it?" She asked him as she walked to the freezer and then slapped an ice pack on his eye.

"Ow, Liv, what are you trying to do? Hurt me more?"

"Suck it up, baby." She teased.

"So now I'm a baby?" Nick asked. "Where's Rollins?"

"She's in court today, why do you care?" Liv smirked.

"I don't." Nick shrugged and went back to the unfinished files on his desk.

But the truth was Nick did care where Rollins was. He wanted to talk to her, find out why she was at the game, why she left and if she knew anyone there. He noticed how red her face got when she knew he caught her checking him out. He chuckled to himself at the thought of Rollins checking him out; he knew she wouldn't like but he wanted to rub it in her face a little.

"Let's go tough guy, we got a case." Liv said as she walked passed him. Nick sighed as he grabbed is suit jacket and followed Liv to the elevator, he knew he was gonna be the butt end of ribbing until his eye healed.

After a day spent in the courthouse Amanda thought about heading back to the station to see what she missed but then thought otherwise, as she didn't want to run into Nick. She powered up her phone and texted Fin to ask if he needed her. After she grabbed a coffee and checked her voicemails she was relieved to see a text from Fin letting her know everything was okay on his end. So she called Cragen to make sure it was okay to head home.

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"Hey, I was beginning to think you didn't work here anymore." Fin announced when Amanda walked into the squad room at the end of the week.

"Stuck in court all week…. It's such a drag." Amanda gave Fin a light side hug, "But it gives my partner time to appreciate me."

"Yeah, the squad room is a drag without you here."

"Aww, how sweet." She smiled at him.

"There's no one for Amaro to argue with so it gets boring. No entertainment."

"Ass!" Amanda picked up the apple that had been on her desk since last week and tossed it at Fin.

"Where's Amaro?" she asked on her way to fill her coffee mug.

"Cribs, Skyping with Maria."

"Oh…" Amanda looked towards the hall that led to the cribs.

"Why do you care?" Fin sat back in his chair and gave her an amused look.

"Who says I care?"

"Why are you asking about him?"

"Geez, Fin! Can't I just ask where other people are?"

"Munch's conspiracy theoried mind is rubbin' off on him." Liv joked as she walked up to her desk.

Nick walked into the squad room right behind Liv, he stopped walking when he caught Amanda's eye. He felt his stomach flip at the sight of her.

"Nick? That was fast." Liv looked at him with some concern.

Nick gave Amanda a bashful smile that last no longer than two seconds.

"Is everything okay?" Liv waved her hand in front of his face to gain his attention, "Maria called me this morning; she said she hadn't been able to reach you all week."

Nick looked at Liv then glanced at Amanda then back to Liv, "Everything's good." He sat at his desk and slipped his iPad in the desk drawer.

Amanda stole another quick look at him; his black eye was fading but still noticeable.

"Hey Rollins, you ever see a handsome dude that somehow manages to appear better looking with a black eye?"

Rollins chuckled but kept her eyes on Fin, she could feel Nick's eyes on her. She felt nervous knowing his eyes were on her. Not able to fight the temptation, she looked up at Nick and they locked eyes again, she felt her mouth involuntarily smile at the twinkle in his eyes.

"What happened?" She took a bold move and asked him a question non work related, they hadn't talked about anything outside of work since before the nasty argument they had a few weeks ago.

"I was elbowed in the eye." He slowly rose from his chair.

"It looks pretty nasty."

"It looks worse than it is, doesn't hurt anymore." He shrugged.

"Amanda, maybe you can convince him to go get an x-ray because he won't listen to me. All week he's been like that little cartoon guy that walks around with birds flying over his head and stars in his eyes."

"Concussion?" She asked Nick.

"Nah, ain't nothing that a beer won't fix." He smiled at her. Fin was right, he was sexier with that black eye, and it gave him a rugged appearance. She caught herself biting down on her bottom lip, staring at him and noticing how sexy his smirk was.

"So let's get some drinks tonight after work?" Liv asked looking at the other detectives.

"I'm game." Fin cocked his head at Nick trying to convince him to go. "C'mon man, when's the last time we went out for drinks with the girls?"

"Fin don't pressure him, we all know he's a choir boy who probably has to call his wife and ask for permission." Amanda teased.

"Choir boy?" Nick laughed with a surprised look.

"Yeah." Amanda bit down on her lip again.

Nick's heart began to beat faster; he felt arousal in his pants and hooked his thumb on his belt buckle. He saw Amanda's eyes go south. "I could tell you a few things that would surprise you."

Amanda held Nick's gaze for a moment longer, "Why don't you show me instead?"

Nick laughed, Amanda had piqued his interest. He stared at her mouth and tried to shake away the thoughts that entered his mind. Her deep pink lips were tantalizing. He couldn't take his eyes off of them.

"Okay you two, keep it PG!" Liv joked and it broke them from their trance.

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Amanda and Olivia sat at a booth inside Mulligan's, a bar near the station. They made small talk while they waited for the guys to show up. Amanda bounced her leg and glanced at her phone, she had five minutes before bets closed on the basketball game tonight. She desperately wanted to place a bet but her conscience was preventing her so far. She turned around when she heard Fin order a beer.

"Hey girls." Fin sat next to Amanda and took a drink from his beer bottle.

"Where's Nick?" Amanda asked.

"What's with you lately? Always asking about Amaro…" Fin teased, waited for Amanda to punch him, "He said to tell you guys he couldn't make it, drinks are on him next time."

"What happened?" Liv asked while she pulled out her phone to text him.

"Zara called him on our way out, asked him to come home. So he went home." Fin shrugged. "That's the kinda shit that happens when you got kids, I guess."

"None of us would know." Liv said with shrugged shoulders.

"I just realized he's the only one who has a kid, the rest of us are single." Amanda mentioned.

"Yeah, he is. I didn't realize that either. Well lucky us." Fin raised his bottle to cheers with the girls.

"Well if you think about it," Liv paused to gather her thoughts, "He's married but kinda like single, too. His wife isn't here and he's raising his daughter by himself."

"Such a choir boy." Amanda shook her head in disappointment which had her co-workers laughing.

Amanda felt the need for some excitement now that she knew Nick wouldn't be joining them. She hit send on her phone and placed her bet. While her co-workers chatted she pretended to listen while she thought of an excuse to head out. Her hand was itching for blackjack.


	3. Chapter 3

She drove for over an hour and finally reached her destination; a dingy bar in an even dingier neighborhood. She stepped inside, slightly nodded her head to acknowledge the bartender.

"Usual?" The bartender asked.

"That would be great."

She sat on the barstool and looked around the small bar, dark stains littered the unfinished wooden floor from the many spilled drinks, the only light around was a dim light for the bartender, the blue glow from the small TV, and the few green and red colored lights randomly placed on the ceiling. She noticed a few men playing pool in the back, laughing over something. She looked at the woman who was draped over a man like a ragdoll. A few other people were here and there, talking and drinking. Her eyes finally gave in and looked at the door next to the single bathroom. A red light seeped through from under the door, Amanda desperately wanted to go in there but she was trying her best to fight it.

"No games tonight?" The bartender asked.

"Not sure yet, don't want to clean the place out." She chuckled and raised her glass to him.

Her mind drifted back to Nick and how disappointed she felt that he didn't show up tonight. He was the sole reason she showed up to a regular bar. Screw it, she thought, she knew better than to get her hopes up over a man and why him all of a sudden? Before she never did things like that because of him. Sure, when he showed up to their outings it was a nice bonus but she never went places and did things with the hopes of him being there and ensuring she would have a good time.

Amanda downed her drink, "Fuck it" she said to herself and walked into the back room of the bar. She sat at the nearest Blackjack table, put down a hundred dollar bill and began the rest of her night.

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The next morning, she walked into work with her hair pulled back, big, dark sunglasses, a trenta Americano in hand; she wore a dark hoodie, blue jeans, and tan Ugg boots.

Nick noticed her walking in and glanced at his watch, "Late night?" he smiled at her.

"Somethin' like that." She mumbled and swallowed four Tylenol with her coffee.

"_That_ hung over?" He asked with raise eyebrows.

She finally looked over at him, her stomach let loose butterflies and she felt angry with him and with herself. "I'm not hung over and I don't want to talk right now." She stared at him through her sunglasses knowing he couldn't see her eyes. She looked at his perfectly pressed black slacks and light blue dress shirt. Guess he didn't get the memo for casual Fridays, she thought.

Cragen popped his head out of his office, "Amaro, I need you to go interview a witness. Take Rollins with you."

"On it. Where's Liv?" Nick asked as he took the sticky note from Cragen.

"Personal day. And act like the elite detectives you are while you're out in public." Cragen smiled and retreated back to his office.

Nick stood up and grabbed his car keys, "Let's go, Party Girl."

Amanda sighed but got up and followed him to the car. As soon he opened her door she slouched in the seat and reclined it back.

"At least put your seatbelt on. How embarrassing would it be if two detectives got pulled over on a seatbelt violation?"

"Mmmm." She grumbled at him and curled her legs up on the seat.

Nick stared at her for a brief moment; she looked gorgeous with messy hair. He leaned over and hovered inches from her pouting lips; he felt a strong temptation to run his tongue between them.

Amanda opened her eyes when she felt him close to her, she inhaled him deeply, "Nick…" she said just before she exhaled.

Hearing his name, he snapped out of his thoughts and cleared his throat, "I'm just putting on your seatbelt." He whispered.

"Okay." She said whispered back, her thigh muscles tightened when she felt his hands close to her hips.

"You smell good." He said just under his breath, his eyes darted down between her legs and he briefly considered what she smelled like down there. But he was pulled out of his reverie when he felt her push his shoulder away.

"Hey…"

"Don't be sniffin' me." Amanda giggled.

They drove the rest of the way in silence.

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After interviewing the witness they walked back to the car. Nick sent a text to Cragen with their new discoveries and Amanda reclined her seat into relaxing position again. She felt him maneuver the car out of the parking stall; she closed her eyes and focused on the hum of the road. After getting on the free way, she felt him brake and after a couple minutes she sat up to see what the holdup was. "What's going on?"

"Traffic jam or accident, not sure."

"C'mon, are you serious?! Is there a way around this?"

"No."

"Pull out up ahead at the turn pike and drive off the freeway."

"I'm not going to drive against traffic in the wrong traffic lane."

"It's not like the other cars are moving!"

Nick felt himself getting annoyed with her and her tone, "Lighten up; it's not my fault you stayed out partying."

"Shut up, Nick." She gripped her throbbing head.

"I'm not going to whisper because you're hung over."

"I'm not hung over!" She snapped at him.

" You wanna go out and do dumb shit, well guess what? You gotta deal with it the next day. And stop treating me like shit because you drank too much."

"Fuck you, Amaro! Why does Cragen even do this to us?"

Nick noticed the driver in the next car craning his neck over to see them argue. He felt embarrassed knowing they were attracting attention with their childish arguing. He bit his tongue, clenched his jaw in an attempt to control his anger. He didn't like that she was able to get under his skin so easily but mostly he was angry with himself and the sexual attraction he recently began to feel for her. It was something he would have deal with on his own and he would start by answering his wife's calls more often. He sighed and said, "I'm sorry, Amanda."

"You're apologizing? What? You outta fight that quick?" she continued to poke at him.

"No. I have plenty more to say but I figured it would be better to act civil in public otherwise we'll attract a bigger audience." He motioned with his head toward the nosey driver.

Amanda flipped him off.

"Amanda, chill. Let's not fight. I don't like making you upset."

She reached over and turned on the radio, without saying anything or looking at him. She faced the window and pretended to be interested in the music.

Nick's phone rang; he turned down the radio while he pulled it out of his pocket. Seeing her picture light up his screen should have made him happy but instead he felt guilty as thoughts of Amanda's lips crossed his mind.

"Hey Baby" he said into his phone.

Amanda turned the radio back up. He looked at her like she was crazy and turned it back down. Maria went right into a one sided conversation, not allowing Nick to say anything. He tried to listen as best as he could but chuckled quietly with Amanda as they continued to fight over the volume. Finally he gave in and stopped messing with the radio.

"Nick, are you listening to me? Why did you laugh? Can you turn down the music?"

"Sorry Maria, Amanda keeps turning the music up. I'm listening though." He gestured for Amanda to stop messing around.

"Amanda? Who's that?"

"Rollins? One of the other detectives I work with?"

"I didn't know you were on a first name basis with… Amanda." She said her name with some anger and Nick picked up on it.

"It's nothin', baby." He squeezed his eyes shut and grimaced as he knew where the conversation was headed.

"Sounds like something to me, Nick. Are you fucking her or just flirting?"

"Maria, stop." Nick felt his heart rate speed up as he grew angry with his wife.

"Me stop? You're the one messin' around."

"Would you stop? I'm not doing this right now." He quickly glanced at Amanda and noticed a small smirk on her face, she was enjoying this. "I'm driving. I can't talk right now." He hit the end call button, squeezed the steering wheel tight and clenched his jaw.

"Calm down, Hulk. You'll rip the wheel right off." She laughed.

"You enjoy makin' my wife get upset with me?" He gave her a serious look but was unable to keep a straight face, her laughter made him laugh.

"I don't know how you do it…" She shook her head.

"Do what?"

"Nothin', nevermind."

"No, you can't do that. Tell me." He poked her ribs.

"Stop" she said through giggles.

"Not until you tell me." He smiled at learning she was ticklish and continued to poke at her.

"Okay, stop… stop!" She pulled away slightly, "I meant I don't know how you can put up with the distance and go without sex for such a long time."

"It's tough. I don't wish it on anyone." He shook his head as he mentally counted how many months it had been.

"How long?"

"It's been awhile." He looked into her eyes and held her gaze for a few seconds.

"How long is awhile?" she prodded.

"Why?"

"Just makin' conversation because obviously we're gonna be sitting in this traffic for awhile and you don't want to argue today."

"Thirteen months." He purposedly avoided her eyes, "What about you?"

"It's been over a year since you had sex?"

"Put your eyes back in your head…it's not that bad." He shrugged but then laughed and ran his fingers through his hair. "Yeah it is that bad… It's torture, to be honest." Nick chuckled and snuck a glance at her; he felt a little uncomfortable talking about sex with another woman. But he wanted to talk about sex with her.

"Yeah sounds like it." She laughed with him.

"So you gonna tell me?" He looked at her and pictured his hands entangled in her messy hair. She was turning him on.

"I think the longest I've gone without sex… would be… six months, I think." She gave him a serious look, "And that was no sexual anything."

"Anything? What do you mean?"

"Like no sex whatsoever, no oral, anal, foreplay, or self pleasure."

"What?! That whole time you never let your fingers wonder?" Images of her with her fingers inside herself flashed through his mind.

"Nope. No fingers, no dildo. Nothing." She gave a nervous laugh as she realized how much she had just revealed to him.

"Why?"

"I'll tell you another time."

"You can't bring it up like that and not tell me why." He grinned at her.

"I will tell you another time, I promise. So, do you keep yourself pure for your wife?"

"I don't have sex with other women." He looked out his window to see if the nosey passenger was watching them.

"You gotta get rid of the mornin' wood somehow…" She looked at him with an arched eyebrow and bit down on her lip.

"Well yeah, I'm a guy…" His eyes lingered on her lips, "I'm human…so naturally I have needs that _I_ take care of."

"Ahhh, I get you." Amanda gave him a cheesy smile with raised eyebrows. "Oh no!" She covered her eyes with her hands, "Ah! I just got a visual! No, no, no!"

Nick laughed, "Well, so we're even… you could give me a visual."

Amanda gasped in surprise at what he said, "Nick!" She punched his shoulder playfully.

"Just an idea…" he gave her his sexy boyish grin and winked.

Finally traffic had begun to move, Amanda turned up the music and thought about Nick in bed late at night, and Nick thought about Amanda thinking about him pleasuring himself. The rest of the drive was silent. Both lost in their enticing thoughts.

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**Short chapter, sorry! I will make it up in the next chapter. Hope you enjoyed their playful flirting, I'm still trying to figure out the story so if you have suggestions or ideas please send them my way. Thanks!**


	4. Chapter 4

**4****th**** Chapter is here, extra long and kinda smutty to make up for the last chapter.**

**Guest who offered ideas, I am willing to go either way with the show's story lines.**

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Nick tucked his daughter into bed and kissed her sleeping face. He thought to himself how precious she was, he wished Maria could be here to see how she grew from day to day. He felt pangs of guilt as he thought how his daughter knew of her mother through Skype and phone calls. A year ago when Maria came home from her first tour in Iraq, Zara's little mind boggled over when she saw her mom in person and asked him why she wasn't inside the phone.

"Good night, I love you, see you in the morning, baby."

He picked up his vibrating iPad, saw the picture of Maria and briefly thought about ignoring her Skype request but then remembered he told himself he was going to answer her calls. He accepted the call and told himself he would try to steer the conversation away from any disagreements.

"Hey"

"Hey, are you awake?"

"Yeah, I was just about to go to bed. How are you?"

"I'm good. Anyone in bed with you?"

"No, please don't be like that."

"Like how, Nick? Worried that my husband is fuckin' around?"

"I'm not gonna have this argument again. If you're lookin' for a fight then call someone else."

She exhaled deeply, "I'm sorry. My mind just gets the best of me, you know that."

"I miss you."

"Me too. How's Zara?"

"She's good, excited for tomorrow. She's having a sleep over with your sister so I'll be home…alone…thinking about the face you make when I slide inside you."

"Nick…" Maria blushed.

"What? Tell me you don't think about it too." He slid his hand down over his package and firmly squeezed his balls.

"You know I do."

"Then tell me about it. Tell me what you think about when you're alone."

"I can't." She said hesitantly.

"Why? Aren't you alone right now?"

"Yes."

"Then? Tell me. Maria, I need you so bad." He circled the head of his penis with his index finger.

"Nick, I can't…" she glanced away.

"Why? I'm always horny, I need to feel you. Don't you miss me?"

"Of course I do. Out here, sex is the last thing on my mind. I'm not worried about that."

"How is it the last thing on your mind? Every time we talk you accuse me of cheating on you. I'm not asking you to jump on a plane and go AWOL, I'm askin' for you to talk dirty, make me feel wanted – I guess it's too much." He snapped.

"Don't be mad at me, Nick." She gave him a pitiful look and her eyes rose up above her iPad and she smiled.

"Everything alright, Grazie?"

"Yes. I'll just be a minute."

She continued smiling at the person whose voice Nick heard. "What happened to Grazie-Amaro?"

"Nick, I gotta go. I'm sorry."

"Maria, who was that?"

"Just another soldier, it's nothing, Nick." Her eyes glanced past her iPad again.

Nick felt uneasy, something seemed off. Angry, he hit the end call button and tossed his iPad onto the nightstand. He felt frustrated with his wife, their marriage, with the distance between them.

He reached into the drawer of his nightstand, pumped some lotion onto his palm and grabbed his dick. He rubbed it until all eight inches of it stood straight up. With his left hand he squeezed his balls and with his right he slid it up and down his shaft but stopped where the head began to form. He tried to picture his wife as best as he could remember, he pictured her ass as he fucked her from behind, the way her ass cheeks shook when he pushed into her. He let his grip slide over the head; he jerked it rapidly, thinking of what it felt like to be inside a tight, wet pussy. When he felt close to cumming, he imagined his hand sliding up her back to the base of her neck, feeling her soft, smooth skin and then grabbing a fistful of her tousled blonde hair and pulling on it firmly, leaning over her and stretching her neck back, biting down on the spot right behind her ear – he exploded in his hand just as he pictured her moaning loudly and biting down on her plump pink lip. He rubbed the head of his dick a few more times as the last of his cum spilled out. Breathing heavily as he came down from his self-induced high, he realized who he had been thinking about.

He got up and went into his bathroom wiped the cum off his dick and washed his hands. He looked at himself in the mirror, "What's happening?" he asked himself. He shook his head at his reflection and once again felt pathetic. He shut off the light, lay in bed and pulled the blanket over his head.

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He met up with Olivia at the scene of their latest case, "Hey Nick, you look like hell."

"You look gorgeous as always." He smiled.

"I meant, are you okay? You don't look too well."

He rubbed his hand over his day old scruff, "Not enough sleep, but I'm fine. What do we have?"

He listened to her read off her notes about the teenager that had been attacked while on her morning jog. From the corner of his eye he saw Rollins approaching them. "I'm gonna go talked to the doorman, see if he knows anything." He hurried off just as Amanda reached them, he felt like she'd know what he done if he looked at her.

He finished up his day working with Olivia, grateful for the distraction of work. He left work to drop Zara at her aunt's house, avoided conversation there and made it just in time for his weekly basketball game. Amanda didn't show up and for that he felt grateful for the second time that day. He went through the motions of his day to day life still trying his best to avoid Amanda and any flirty or playful banter. He talked to her about the cases at hand but always kept it professional and on topic. He didn't even jerk off in fear of fantasizing about a woman other than his wife; instead he took his sexual frustration out on the gym. His life was back to "boring single parent" save for the excitement and craziness his five year old produced.

Two weeks later, Amanda was sharing a cab with Ashley who had somehow convinced her to catch another basketball game.

"So is Nick still acting like an ass with you?"

"No, actually things were pretty good with us a few weeks ago. We were mostly getting along and then all of a sudden he's cold towards me."

"Why?"

"No clue, I try to play around with him and he won't engage. He's gone from asshole, to playful, to distant detective on the same squad as me. I can't even call him a co-worker because that involves some coordination on both ends."

"Frank hasn't mentioned anything but then again Nick never really talks about work or anything personal."

"Enough about Nick." Amanda sighed and thought about the hot streak she'd been on at the tables, last night she won three grand playing Blackjack but lost a grand when the Hawks lost to the Heat.

Arriving at the park, the two ladies climbed out of the cab, Amanda handed the cabbie his money and they walked over to the bleachers. Amanda quickly scanned the group of men huddled near Frank, no Nick. She felt a little disappointed that he wasn't there, truth be told, she was looking forward to devouring his body with her eyes.

She spotted Nick walk onto the sidelines and sit down on the bench with his teammates. He fist bumped a few of the guys and laughed at something Amanda couldn't make out.

"There's Nick." Ashley elbowed Amanda and pointed in his direction.

"Is he playing?" She asked as she noticed he was wearing blue jeans and a t-shirt with a black ball cap instead of dressed half naked in basketball shorts.

"I don't know…"

He joined the eight guys in a huddle and then pulled off his white t-shirt and jogged onto the court with five others.

"Well that answers our question." Ashley grinned at Amanda.

"Uh huh." Amanda muttered but was already lost in that tanned, perfect body.

She followed him with her eyes as he ran up and down the basketball court, shooting threes like it was the easiest thing to do. During a time out she watched him bounce from one foot the other with his hands on his hips, she could tell adrenaline was going haywire in his body, his veins were engorged in his arms and his chest looked slightly moist with sweat. The ref blew the whistle and they guys ran back onto the court. Amanda allowed her eyes to roam his upper body again when he stood still waiting for his teammate to shoot a free throw. His chest rose rapidly but his abs stayed still and defined. Her eyes wondered down to his hips, that man had undeniably sexy hips, she thought to herself. He looked sexy; his white underwear band clung to his hips, his jeans hung slightly below his hips, Nick wasn't wearing a belt so he occasionally pulled them up when they fell lower. His ass was what kept the jeans from falling to his ankles and wrapping around his black Jordans. Out there on the court she never would have guessed he was a detective. He looked like a man that belonged in a woman's fantasy.

At half time, Amanda noticed Frank shake his empty water bottle at Ashley. "Girl, I need to get Frank more water. Want anything?"

"I'll come with you."

Ashley bought Frank's water and Amanda ordered two waters. She noticed Nick hadn't drunk water and didn't remember seeing him with any when he showed up. Frank met them when they were half ways back to the court but Amanda made her way past him, over to Nick. She saw Nick grab his t-shirt from the bench and shove it down his pants; he widely squatted before he pulled it out and threw it back on the bench.

"Can I have that?" They both turned in the direction of the cat call and laughed.

She caught his eye and she looked at him with shock and confusion, "What did you just do?" She chuckled.

"I'm sweaty." He laughed, "I'm sorry, no one was supposed to see that."

"Are you invisible? How are people not supposed to see?" She gave him a funny look and handed him a bottle of water.

"Thanks." He said as he accepted the water and then grabbed his crotch to adjust his package.

"What are you doing?" Amanda blushed looking at him grab himself.

"Sorry I have to make some adjustments." He smiled at her.

"I'm just going to walk away like I didn't see any of this."

"Too late, it's burned into your memory." He picked up his t-shirt and tossed it at her.

"Nick!" She laughed, "Ew, that's gross!" She tossed it back at him.

"It's fuckin' hot today…" He wiped his neck with his shirt.

Amanda gave his torso a once over before she pressed her cold water bottle onto his chiseled chest. "Feel better?"

He locked her eyes with his, placed his hand over hers to hold the cold bottle against his hot skin. "It feels good." He slightly groaned in hushed voice.

"Amaro" one of the guys called, "Let's go."

Nick looked back to see the guys walk onto the court, "Let's get some drinks after the game."

In a daze, Amanda nodded her head yes as she realized her told her, not asked her to get drinks after the game. She was turned on by his assertiveness as well as his physicality.

After the game Nick and some of the guys from the team went to the bar with Amanda, Ashley, and a few other girls in tow. Nick led Amanda by the small of her back and pulled out a barstool for her. He ordered two Corona beers and scanned the good sized crowd in the bar.

Amanda felt nervous, unsure of what she should do or say. She enjoyed the way he led her to the bar and how he leaned against the bar with his body facing her. She felt like she was there with him, not with Ashley.

Nick nudged her side, she turned to look at him, "Shot?" he asked.

"Sure."

He turned to the bartender, "Two shots of Don Julio, please."

The bartender looked at Amanda then back at Nick and nodded her head as she finished mixing a bright green drink.

After a few beers and a couple shots later Amanda made her way from the ladies' room, she pulled Nick into a side hug, place her hand on his stomach and tippy toed to whispered into his ear, "I need a favor."

"What is it?"

"I ran into this guy on the way to the bathroom, I told him you were my boyfriend."

Nick shot his face down to her, "Why would you say that?"

"We used to hook up and I stopped answering his calls after a couple weeks. He asked me what happened and I told him I met someone else. I guess he saw me sitting with you earlier because he asked if you were my boyfriend. I said yes. Please go with it." She looked at him with a worried look and bit down on her bottom lip.

"You owe me, Rollins."

Amanda smiled at him, relieved he was willing to play along. "Let's go to the back so he won't see us."

Nick took control, grabbed her hand and led her towards a booth in the back of the dark bar. "So how am I supposed to act like your boyfriend?"

"I don't know just sit next to me and say funny things."

Nick slid into the booth and Amanda slid in beside him, he put his arm around her waist and pulled her close, "Like this?"

She turned to face him; his face was inches from hers. "Yeah…" she leaned into his body and placed her hand on his thigh. She inhaled him with closed eyes; somehow he still managed to smell good even after an hour of sweating on the basketball court.

Nick felt her hand on his thigh; he placed his hand over hers.

Amanda realized he might be uncomfortable with her touching him, "Is this okay?"

He ran her hand over up and down his thigh, "Mmmhmm. But don't be too surprised when you feel something poke your hand."

Amanda threw her head back laughing, "Nick…" she placed her other hand on his chest.

"What? You said be funny…" He chuckled and rubbed her hip and outer thigh with his large hand.

Amanda noticed how often Nick licked his lips and she desperately wanted to taste him. She felt giddy being so close to him, wrapped in his arm, with their hands on each other's bodies. He's married, she reminded herself. How wrong would it be to kiss him, lick him, and feel him inside her?

"So I'm prepared…will it be a large or small something that pokes my hand?"

Nick laughed and glanced away from her for a moment, "If I tell you, do you promise not to tell anyone?"

"Yes."

"Do you promise not to laugh?"

Amanda laughed, "I won't…I'll try my best not to."

Nick glanced around them again to make sure no one was paying attention to them, "Small." He whispered in her ear.

"What?" Amanda asked with surprise smile on her face, "I don't believe you."

"You don't have to believe me but it's true. I have a small dick, it's like four inches."

She looked at him expecting him to crack a smile. "I don't believe you, you gotta at least be average." She picked up his hand to exam how large it was compared to hers.

Changing the subject he asked, "So where's this guy? Are you going to let me see what kinda guys you hook up with?"

"I'll tell you when he comes this way. He's nothin' special, just a guy I had sex with."

"So if we had sex, I wouldn't be special? I would want to be." He winked at her.

"You thought about us having sex?"

Nick looked away and said, "I'm married."

"I know you're married but that doesn't mean you can't fantasize about other women or be tempted by other women."

"I'm not a cheater."

"Fantasizing and being tempted by another woman is not cheating, going through with them is."

"What do you fantasize about?"

"What?" she looked at him with disbelief.

"What do you fantasize about? What turns you on?"

"Have you thought about us having sex?"

Nick reached into his pocket for his phone, "You can't answer a question with a question." He looked at the screen and saw Maria's face. "Shhh, don't say anything."

"Hello?"

"Nick?"

"Yeah, it's me. What's going on?"

"Where are you? It's pretty loud."

"Hold on." He muted his phone, "I have to take this outside."

Amanda nodded and slid out of the booth; Nick climbed out right behind her and went out the nearest exit. Amanda sat back down, went through her phone for a few minutes responding to messages then she felt the need to get him off the phone and steer his attention back to her. She finished her beer and went out the same door he did.

She saw him standing in the patio off to the side with his back to the small group of people. Amanda walked up behind him and ran her hands over his shoulders.

Nick craned his neck back and smiled when he saw her, he held his finger up to her lips to keep her silent. He grabbed her hand and led her in front of him. He rolled his eyes and pointed to his phone. Amanda mouthed "Hang up." He pushed her a few steps back until she was against the patio fence. Amanda gasped when she felt him run his hand over the outline of her outer breast; he trailed his finger under her breast up to the low neck line of her top. He pulled her top down slightly and her skin burned where his fingers touched. He ran his hand down her torso and over her hips. He reached behind her and grabbed a handful of her ass, he clenched his jaw and smiled at her with a sinful grin.

"Yes, I'm listening." He said into his phone.

Amanda put her hands on his hips and pulled him into her so their torsos were touching. She ran her hands up to his chest and back down his abs. Nick ran his finger inside the front waist of her jeans and gently tugged at her button. Amanda tried to put her hand over his dick that was beginning to poke through his jeans, but was surprised when he caught her hand before she could touch him. "You're bad." He mouthed to her. She looked up at him with questioning eyes, why would he not let her touch him?

Nick grabbed another handful of her ass and let out a small chuckle when he saw her wet lips slightly part in surprise. "Nothin'. I'm listening, go ahead." He slid his hand under her top and pressed his palm against her bare stomach, slid his hand down her jeans, his fingers grazed over her mound and he felt heat and moisture coming from inside her. He slipped his middle finger inside her, putting pressure against her clit. She let out a quiet moan.

He was standing so close to her she heard Maria ask, "Was that a moan? Why are you breathing like that?" Amanda covered her mouth to stifle her giggle.

Nick pulled his hand out and sucked her off his finger. "I have to go. I'll call you tomorrow." Nick hung up and shoved his phone into his pocket, he pressed his forehead against hers, grabbed her ass and pulled her into him.

"Amanda?" They heard Ashley call out to her.

Quickly, they broke apart. Nick kept his back to her to hide his boner.

"Yeah, what's up Ash?"

"Take me home please. Frank is a dick and I'm done with him!" Ashley wiped the tears that fell from her eyes.

"Yeah, c'mon honey, I'll take you home." She looked at Nick and bit down on her lip.

He nodded to let her know he understood her friend needed her.

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Nick left the bar soon after Amanda did; he went home and showered, ate a light dinner and sat down on the sofa with a beer. It felt late but it was barely 8pm, he flipped through the channels not really paying much attention to what was on. Amanda was on his mind, he kept replaying what happened between them over and over. He felt guilty for what he had done but another part of him felt happy and alive. He wanted to feel her again and again.

His thoughts were interrupted by his cell phone alerting him of a new text; he smiled when he saw her name.

Amanda: Sorry abt earlier.

Nick: what part of earlier?

Amanda: Leaving w Ashley

Nick: No worries, she needed u

Amanda: r we good?

Nick: fantastic

Amanda: Drinks again soon?

Nick: Yes. Weds after work?

Amanda: Ok.

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**We're building up to the wild part of this story! I'm excited! Next chapter you will have to read it alone because it gets **_**heavy.**_** I will begin writing that right now but in the mean time I would like for you to share what you like and don't like about this story. I want you all to enjoy it so let me know how I can make it enjoyable!**

**Thank you!**


	5. Chapter 5

Nick sat at his desk across from Olivia; they chatted lightly while they typed up some reports and waited for Rollins and Fin to come back with lunch. He tried to avoid conversation about Maria because he had been dodging her calls since that night at the bar with Rollins and he knew it was a matter of time before Maria would call Liv to check up on him. So he pulled out his phone and sent a text to Maria letting her know he was swamped at work but would call her when he had the chance.

Rollins walked in and Nick's eyes were glued to her body, he tried not looking at her but the temptation was too strong and he gave in. The knee length white skirt she wore hugged her hips and ass in all the right places, she wore a dark blue, ¾ length sleeve button up dress shirt tucked into her skirt, a stylish brown belt was tied around her waist and she wore matching brown heels. It was the skirt that was driving him crazy and her top even more so. She had the shirt buttoned to just above her breasts which left her cleavage slightly exposed. When she leaned a certain way it appeared as if one of her breasts would pop out and Nick eagerly wanted to catch it if it did.

Amanda approached him and noticed he was somewhere lost in his thoughts, "Everything alright, Choir Boy?" She held out the sandwich container to him as she sat back on the edge of his desk.

Nick noticeably looked her body up and down before he met her eyes; he smiled when he saw her blushing face. "Sorry." He shrugged, "Everything is definitely good." He winked at her and gave her breasts more of his intense eye contact.

"Hungry?" She asked with a cocked eyebrow.

"Starving…" he said without breaking eye contact with her breasts.

Amanda put his container on the desk and slightly leaned forward. Nick's hand reached down and groped his package. He looked up at her with a smile.

Amanda laughed and tossed his wrapped up plastic ware at him. "You're bad." She whispered close to his ear before she walked back to her desk.

He watched her walk away before he shook the thoughts away from his mind. He felt eyes on him and glanced at Liv who had watched him check out Amanda when she walked away. He shrugged at her but she rolled her eyes and started on her lunch. The four detectives laughed and joked while they ate and when conversation started to die down Nick grabbed a french fry and tossed it at Amanda, aiming for her cleavage. They laughed in surprise as he made it in on the first try. He tossed a few more fries making them all in; Amanda dug them out and tossed them back at him.

"Hey, you two, behave yourselves. Am I running a squad or a daycare?"Cragen snapped at them on his way to the coffee machine.

"Nick, have you talked to Maria?" Liv asked.

"Um…No, not really." He glanced at Amanda, "We keep missing each other's calls."

"She just sent me a text."

"Yeah? Bout what?"

"Just asking if you were okay, that she hadn't been able to reach you for a couple of days."

"Do me a favor, don't text her back. I just texted her 20 minutes ago and I'm gonna call her later when I'm home."

Liv nodded her head in agreement with a confused and unsure expression.

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It was midweek and the SVU squad was close to calling it quits for the day. Nick and Amanda exchanged a few texts confirming their plans to get some drinks after work and agreed to invite Liv and Fin. The squad gathered their things and packed into cab. Fin rode up front with the cabbie while the ladies sat on either side of Nick. He slouched down with his legs spread wide and put an arm around both ladies.

Fin glanced back at them and laughed, "Fuckin' Nick! I ain't mad but you gotta teach me how to be smooth like you."

"Here" Liv handed him her phone, "Take our picture. Amanda let's act like we're his lovers."

The four of them laughed and Fin snapped a few shots of them with their hands on Nick's thighs or clawing and tugging at his clothes, Nick just sat back with a huge grin on his face.

"Hey Liv, post that shit with hash tag pretty boy problems."

Nick smirked, "Yeah, life is so hard when you're pretty." He turned and winked at Amanda.

The cabbie pulled up to an Irish pub they occasionally went to called O'Flanagan's. Fin paid the fare and Nick agreed to buy the first round. Amanda found a booth while Liv found the ladies' room and Fin slid in next to Amanda. Nick set the pitcher of beer and four glasses on the table before he sat down opposite Fin and Amanda. When Liv came back she controlled the conversation with fun, light hearted talk purposely steering the others away from work talk when it popped up. It was something they had all agreed upon when they first began hanging out together outside of work. They agreed work was stressful and never ending but refused to let it control their lives outside of work.

When Amanda and Fin were engaged in sports talk Liv took the chance to catch up with Nick, "So how's Zara? You haven't mentioned her lately."

"She's doing great. Growing a lot, she's gonna be tall." Nick looked at her with smiling eyes.

"Well makes sense, you and Maria are both tall. How's Maria?"

"Zara is actually with my Mom tonight. She begged both of us for weeks to take her to see ballet. So my Mom gave in."

"You're Mom is awesome. She's a blessing to you and Zara." Nick nodded his head in agreement while he traced patterns on the table with the condensation from his glass. "So things aren't too well with her?" Nick nodded his head again. "Care to talk about it?"

"Not really."

"Can I just ask if it's that bad or is it just stubbornness?"

"I'm not sure. There wasn't an argument or disagreement, something is just wrong and I don't know what it is. I think if she was home then we'd be able to figure things out."

"But it's not like she can just leave, she has a duty to her country."

Nick looked Liv in the eyes, "She also has a duty to our daughter and our marriage."

"Sorry, Nick. I didn't mean that in a bad way, sorry if it came out that way."

"Don't be sorry. I don't want to talk about this right now." He smiled at her, "Let's enjoy the night?"

"You got it, babe."

"Liv, let's shoot some darts?" Fin asked getting up from the booth. "Darts?" he asked the other two detectives, both shook their heads no. Liv followed him across the pub to the dart wall.

Nick turned to Amanda and smiled when he saw she was already staring at him. They stared at each other for half a minute, not saying a word, just grinning at each other.

"See something you like?" Amanda batted her eyelashes.

"We're finally alone…"

"Mmhmm…"

"What do you want to do?"

Amanda slipped off her shoe and slid her foot up his leg. Nick grinned at her as she slid her foot along his inner thigh, "what are you doin'?" he chuckled.

"I want to play…" with her toe she firmly pushed on his package.

Nick slouched down in the booth a little and opened his legs wider, "Easy…"

Amanda took his posture as an okay to keep going, she lightly pushed on his package again and went back to rubbing her foot along his inner thigh. They sat across from each other grinning with their eyes in a lock. "what's next?" Nick asked her.

"You tell me…"

Amanda tried to pull her foot back when she saw Liv walking back to the booth. Nick grabbed her foot before she could pull it away; she looked at him with shocked eyes. Liv sat next to him and drained her glass, "well there went the darts idea."

"What happened?" they both asked.

"Fin joined a competition and forgot about me!" she feigned a sad look which made Nick and Amanda laugh. Amanda tried to pull her foot back again but he still held on and began massaging her foot. Liv gave both of them a once over noticing they were both slouched down. "You guys getting lazy on me?"

"Why?" Nick asked.

"Because you're both slouched down, ready for bed huh?"

The two detectives looked at each other awkwardly; Nick still held her foot as Amanda straightened up a little. He rested her heel right on his package and clenched his kegals to tease her a little. Amanda could feel his fattie against her foot and felt herself getting moist just knowing she was turning him on. She wanted him bad and tonight she planned on ridin' on his stallion.

"Yeah I should probably head home soon." Amanda looked over at Nick and moistened more upon seeing his boyish grin.

"What about you Liv?" he asked.

"After another beer or two. I'm gonna order another pitcher."

"Put it on my tab, I left it open."

Once Liv was out of ear shot Amanda jerked her foot from Nick's grip, "what are you doing? She could have seen!"

Nick laughed, "yeah she could have but that's the exciting part." He winked at her.

"An exhibitionist?"

"No, I just enjoy watching you blush."

Liv came back with another pitcher and topped off all their glasses. Fin yelled for her to come join him, the team he was playing with needed another person. Left alone once again, Amanda intended on executing her plan to seduce Nick. The fact that he was married made her feel guilt but she saw it more of doing him a favor because he hadn't had sex in so long. Just one time is what she told herself. When she came back from the restroom she had her skirt hiked up a little more, she sat next to Nick who was talking to the waitress. Amanda turned her body towards him, placed her hand on his thigh and squeezed. He stopped in mid-sentence when he felt her touch, she whispered into his ear, "I'm so fuckin' horny right now." She pulled his hand down onto her lap, Nick turned to face her with a goofy grin. Amanda nibbled on his ear lobe, she turned back to the waitress who was still standing at their booth, and said "you can go now. Thank you." The waitress rolled her eyes and walked away.

"You're sexy when you're sassy."

Amanda grabbed his package and bit down on her bottom lips, "you like it?"

Nick let out a low groan, "yes…" his phone went off, he reached into his pocket but Amanda grabbed it out of his hand. "hey" he reached for it but Amanda held it at arm's distance. She saw Maria's picture light up the screen and she pressed the ignore button. "what are you doin'?"

"She doesn't get to have your attention right now."

Nick smiled at her; he liked the way she was taking control, "why not?"

"All she does is make you get angry, I don't like Angry Nick." She licked the spot below his earlobe, where his neck and jaw met.

Nick slowly pulled her skirt up and let his fingers graze the inside of her thighs, he looked at Amanda whose lips were slightly parted, and could tell her body was reacting to his every touch. This turned Nick on immensely, knowing he could turn a woman on with a simple touch when he couldn't even get his wife to have phone sex with him. He bit down on his bottom lip and let out another low groan when his finger tips grazed the lips of her pussy revealing the fact that she wasn't wearing any panties.

"You like that?" she whispered to him. Before he could answer his phone went off again and Amanda powered it down. She reached down and grabbed his dick again, she felt it lengthen out along his thigh, "yeah you do." She squeezed it again. "You are such a liar."

"What did I lie about?" he inserted his finger and applied pressure to her clit.

"This isn't small and it isn't no four inches."

Nick laughed and applied deeper pressure before he began working his finger over her clit. "Mmmm, you're so wet."

"This is what you're foot massage did to me."

"Let's see what my fingers can do to you." Nick rubbed her clit harder and faster, he stared at Amanda the whole time and loved watching her face flush different shades of pink, her breathing became more and more hitched. She tried to push his hand away when a moan escaped her lips. But Nick kept at it and grinned at her when she tried to straighten up in the booth. She pushed his hand away again when he applied even more pressure and this time Nick relented and smirked at her. He eyed her as he licked her juices off his fingers.

"Let's get out of here." She said through an exhale. Nick nodded and followed her out of the booth; he grabbed her hand to pull her towards the bar. He still needed to close out his tab.

They slipped out of the bar without saying anything to Fin or Liv. They jumped into a cab and attacked each other's mouths hungrily. Amanda grabbed on his dick again and Nick's hands groped her breasts then went down to her ass, he grabbed a handful of it while his tongue darted in and out of her mouth, he sucked on her lips and licked them with the tip of his tongue. They parted to catch their breath and the cabbie took the opportunity to ask where he was taking them.

"My place or yours?" Amanda asked.

Nick's bedroom, his daughter, his wedding day, and his wife's face Skyped face and army fatigues all flashed through his mind in half a second. "Yours."

Amanda rambled off her address to the cabbie and crashed her lips back onto his. They made out like horny teenagers in the backseat of the cab, their hands roaming each other's bodies and nibbling on each other's ears. The cabbie pushed down on the break hard when he pulled up to Amanda's apartment. "Okay Nick and Amanda, 15 even please."

Nick pulled a 20 from his wallet and apologized to the cabbie. He followed her up to her apartment; she quietly opened her door so her elderly neighbor wouldn't stick her head out in the hall. Once inside she pushed Nick against the door and kissed him hard as she tugged on his hair. She only pulled away when Frannie started barking at her demanding her attention. Amanda kneeled down and showered Frannie with affection and attention.

"Do you want a drink?" she asked Nick. He nodded and followed her into the kitchen. They stared at each other in silence only taking long drinks from their beers. He wanted her naked and dripping wet but images of his wife flashed in his mind again. He took another long drink and set the bottle on the counter. He wrapped his arms around Amanda's waist and pulled her into him, controlling the deep kiss he gave her and pushing his fat dick against her. He backed her up against the small table she had in her kitchen, pulled up her skirt and lifted her onto the table top. He dropped down to his knees and let Amanda peel his suit jacket off of him. Nick lifted her legs in the air and spread them wide; he licked the length of her pussy, bit the inside of her thighs and sucked on her pussy lips. He passionately bit the top of her mound before darting his tongue over her clit, with his lips he nipped at her clit before sucking on it. He moved his hands down the bottom of her thighs and lifted her hips slightly. Amanda kept her legs spread for him and he teased the spot between her pussy and her ass. He felt her thigh muscles clench tighter when he ran his tongue over her ass and rimmed the outer area of her ass hole. Nick pulled his head back and saw cum dripping out of her, hungrily he slurped it up and slipped two fingers inside her while her tongue worked her clit. Amanda moaned and whimpered with his touch and pressure before she let out a guttural groan as her cum gushed out of her onto his fingers and mouth, it dripped onto his chin. She pulled on his hair as he licked her clean; it caused her legs to shake once more and a little more cum leaked out of her.

Nick sat back breathing heavily as Amanda regained her composure. As his breathing began to even out Maria came back into his mind, he was beginning to realize what he had just done. He didn't noticed Amanda slide off the table, he only felt her pulled on his tie as she led him to the couch. Amanda pulled off the tie, unbuckled and took off his belt tossing it behind her; she unzipped his fly and pulled his package out more over his slacks. She jerked and squeezed him over his boxer briefs. He let her pull him out of his underwear, his head felt dizzy and like he was having an out of body experience. He could see himself sitting back against the couch, Amanda on her knees between his legs with her mouth sucking the head of his dick. He could hear himself moaning and see his head tossed back with pleasure as his fingers entangled her hair. He felt light headed and nauseous. He saw Maria walk through the front door, scream and drop her bags when she saw another woman with her husband's dick in her mouth. Nick pushed Amanda away and stood up.

"Nick?" she looked confused.

"I'm sorry, Amanda. I can't do this." He stood up and quickly zipped his pants. "I'm sorry." He gave one last look before he walked out the door.


	6. Chapter 6

**This chapter will include Spanish and Italian; in parenthesis I included the English translation. Hope it is not too confusing.**

**SMUT warning!**

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By the time Nick got home it was around midnight, he shed his clothes down to his underwear and climbed under his blanket. He laid there crying for a few moments; he kept going over the events that happened with Amanda and trying to figure out how he had let it get that far. He had never cheated in his life and after 6 years of marriage he had betrayed his wife, his family and his marriage. He knew he had to confess what he'd done but was over the phone the way to do it, especially when his wife was in Iraq. He thought about calling his Mom but decided against it when he noticed the time and figured she'd be asleep. So he did what he felt he needed to do. He picked up his phone from the floor, noticed a message from Amanda but ignored it and called Maria.

After several rings she finally picked up, "Nick, are you just getting home?" she asked with worry in her voice.

"Yeah, do you have a few minutes?"

"Yes, what's wrong amore mio?" (my love)

"I miss you."

"I miss you too. I was getting worried because you hadn't answered my calls lately. Is everything okay?"

"Yes and no. There's a lot going on."

"Is it Zara?"

"No, no. Zara is fine; she's with my Mom tonight. But there's something I need to tell you." Maria stayed quiet so Nick continued. "Are you still in love with me?"

"What?"

"Just please answer me."

"Of course, Nick, non credo pazzo." (don't think crazy)

"I can't help it. My mind wonders too much these days. It's been so long, Maria, I can barely remember what your hands feel like; the sound of your laughter is fading. We don't laugh anymore."

"Have you been drinking?"

"Have you done anything to disrespect our marriage?"

"Are you asking if I've fucked someone else?"

"Fucked, licked, sucked, kissed, have you been with another man in an inappropriate way?" He asked angrily.

"Non ho tempo per questo." (I don't have time for this.)

"Rispondere ella domanda maledetto!" (Answer the damn question.)

"I have to go."

Nick threw his phone back on the floor when he heard her hang up. He cried himself to sleep and called into work the next day.

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Amanda went to bed and woke up confused as hell. What the hell happened? She kept asking herself. One minute they were all over each other unable to breath and the next minute he gets up and leaves. She went into work in a grumpy mood, noticed he was nowhere to be found but decided not to ask where he was. He hadn't even responded to her text, all she asked was if he was okay.

Fin interrupted her thoughts, "Someone woke up pissed off."

"Sorry, Fin. Bad night."

"Aren't you going to ask where the Amaro is?"

"No."

"Somethin' happen between you two last night?"

"What? No, why?"

"You both left without saying anything, Liv figured you guys ended up in an argument."

"Nah."

"Well he's taking a personal day. If you were wondering."

"I wasn't but thanks."

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Nick went to his Mom's after he knew she would be home from taking Zara to school. She was surprised to see him, it wasn't often he visited her in the early morning. She noticed he didn't have the usual happiness in his eyes.

"Lo qu está a mal mi hijo guapo?" (What's wrong my handsome son?)

Nick sat on the sofa and broke down crying, he confessed to his Mom what he had done the night before, leaving out the details.

"Nicky" She took his face in her hands and dried his tears, "I understand how you feel. But it was bound to happen eventually."

"How? I'd never done anything like this before. She's my wife, Ma. I've disrespected my marriage."

"No. Do not beat yourself up over this. Yes, she's your wife but she's your wife on paper. Nicky, she has not been around in the last four years. A few months here and there but not like a wife and mother should be."

Nick leaned forward with his head in his hands. His Mom continued, "I understand she had a duty to her country, the first time she went to Iraq. Maybe she felt like she had to go because you had been there as well. I thank the Lord he brought you home safely. But she did not have to go a second time. Maria needed to put her daughter and you first but she didn't so how can she expect you to put her first?" Cesaria waited a few moments before asking such a powerful question, "Are you still in love with her?"

"I've been asking myself that question for months, Ma. I don't think I am…I don't think she's in love with me either."

"And this other girl? Do you like her?"

"Yes."

"Then talk to Maria, let her know you aren't happy and that something has to change. Tell her you kissed that girl but let her know how you really feel, Nicky. You can't stay married for Zara; Zara doesn't know what a normal marriage is like, so if things do not work with you and Maria her life wouldn't be turned upside down. She's already used to her mother being away."

Nick let his Mom pull him into an embrace like she always did whenever he was sick or sad as a boy. "Mi bebé todo estara bien. Te amo mi hermoso niño." (My baby, everything will be okay. I love you my beautiful boy.)

He ended up spending the rest of the day with his Mom, watching her novellas (Spanish soap operas) with her and drinking café con leché and eating pan. He left when it was time to pick up Zara from school and upon Zara's insistence they went on a daddy-daughter date.

Nick went into work the next day and acted like nothing had happened with Amanda. He treated her the way he treated her before she ever showed up to his basketball game, he stuck close to Liv but glanced Amanda's way when he thought no one was looking. Today she wore basic black slacks with a purple v neck top, the purple turned her blue eyes into bright lavender and Nick felt mesmerized by her. He noticed her hair tied up in a messy bun, personally he thought she should wear her hair like that every day. When Amanda caught his eye Nick smiled at her but she rolled her eyes at him.

Amanda felt a strong attraction to Nick but she wasn't into playing games. She didn't want him to be her boyfriend or anything like that. She just wanted to fuck his brains out, one time. One time is all she wanted and felt that's what she needed to get him out of her system. After that, she felt they could go back to hating and disagreeing with each other. But after the other night she second guessed whether or not it could happen. Most guys would go crazy over a girl willing to give head but Nick, St. Nick, had to stop her and probably run home and confess to his wife through tears that he let another woman touch his weenie. Amanda peaked his way through her bangs and rolled her eyes at him. Damn him for sitting there and looking so sexy, she thought to herself.

"I have some good news." Cragen smiled at his squad. The squad gathered around their captain.

"Is Amaro getting transfer the good news?" Amanda asked Cragen with a sarcastic tone. Nick looked at her feigned hurt and tugged on her bun.

"Ass." He smiled boyishly at her.

"No, Amaro stays. **(A/N: I wrote this part hours before the finale. *cries again*)**But Jeff Brown, the uncle of Eli Brown, the boy we safely returned to his parents last week, happens to be the assistant publicist for the Yankees and he has sent us box seats to this weekend's game."

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Nick was the last one to show up to the Yankee game, Liv went down to meet him. They stopped at the concession stand and Nick ordered three beers then turned to ask Liv is she wanted anything.

"Why are you ordering so many beers?" She asked checking her phone. She looked up when he didn't answer to see him chugging one of the beers. "Nick?!" He dropped the empty cup in the nearby trash can.

"What?" He drained a second beer, turned to the girl at the registered and ordered two more.

"Why are you drinking like that?"

"I ordered one for you too." He smiled at her as he handed her a beer.

"There's an open bar in our box."

"Good, I'll just drink these on my way up then. Oh, and I have to tell you" He looked her up and down, "You look incredibly sexy wear that Yankees shirt." He said with a wink.

Liv laughed, "Have you been drinking?"

"Liv, I'm offended."

"Thank you for the compliment. You look youthful and handsome when you wear your ball caps."

"I aim to please." He smiled at her as they entered the elevator.

Just as they entered the box suite Liv noticed Nick's face light up with a huge grin; she followed his gaze and saw Amanda at the other end of it. Amanda was beaming up at him. She looked back at Nick and saw him drink her in and stop at the ball cap she was wearing. Something was different about those two she thought to herself.

Nick sat down next to Amanda and made it obvious he was looking her over. She looked cute dressed in her flip flops, cut-off denim shorts, white cami and a gray grandfather cardigan. Nick noticed she wasn't wearing a bra and he could see her nipples were hardened, "What are you wearing?"

Amanda looked herself up and down, "These things are called clothes."

"That hat."

"You don't like my Mets hat?"

Nick shook his head and he drank from his beer. "You should be wearing my Yankees."

"Maybe I should just be wearing you." She batted her eyelashes at him.

"Mmm…I can picture you wearing only my Yankees cap."

"Hey, Amaro come look at this." Cragen called him over.

Nick stood up but leaned down near Amanda's ear and quietly said, "I'm sorry about what didn't happen the other night."

Amanda turned and watched Nick walk towards their captain. She admired his backside which looked incredible in his dark denim jeans; she looked at his back and could see how muscular it was through his gray Yankees t-shirt. She thought back to the times she saw him shirtless on the basketball court. Her thoughts were interrupted when Fin and Liv took the seats on either side of her.

Amanda made small talk with Fin and Liv but kept glancing back to see if Nick was done talking with Cragen and Munch. She was relieved when he finally came back and sat outside with them. "Rollins, take off that hat already."

"Let's make a bet?"

"Okay. What?"

"If Yankees win, I'll wear your hat but if they lose then you have to wear my hat."

"Deal." He extended his hand for her to shake and smiled upon feeling her soft skin against his. His mind immediately flashed back to the night she had her hands on his dick. He smiled at her with intense eyes.

Nick went back inside to watch the game with Cragen and Munch, during the 7th inning strectch the squad ran down to the closest bleachers to be part of the wave. Nick took advantage of his alone time with Amanda. She was with her back to him talking to someone on the phone; he walked up behind her and placed his hands on her hips and gently pulled her into his hips. She twisted her neck to see it was him; Nick slid his hands up under her cami and caressed her belly, he felt her tense up and stop talking he continued up to her breasts and lightly thumbed her nipples and caressed her breasts in his hands. He leaned down to her ear and whispered, "I wanna fuck you right now."

Amanda hung up without saying bye and allowed Nick to lead her by the hand. He opened the restroom door in the box room, his mouth was immediately on hers sucking in her air, he slammed the door shut with his foot, and lifted her up onto the sink counter. They kissed hard and hungrily, he knocked off her Mets cap when he grabbed handfuls of her hair and pulled her mouth closer to his, Nick pulled down her shorts and panties letting them fall to her ankles. He slid his fingers inside her and felt how wet she was, he moaned from deep in his throat when he felt her all over his fingers. Amanda knocked his cap off and tugged at his curls. Nick held onto Amanda and with his other hand he unbuttoned his jeans and shoved down his boxer briefs. He spread Amanda's legs a little wider and Amanda felt his hard dick poke her belly. Amanda grabbed onto him tighter, a part of her fearing that he would pull away from her like he did last time.

"Fuck me" she whined while biting his bottom lip. Nick pushed all of him inside her and smiled when he heard the surprised whimper escape her mouth. Nick rapidly thrust himself inside her, reveling in her tightness and the grip her pussy kept on his dick. He grunted with each thrust and bit down hard on her neck before sucking on it fiercely. Again she cried out from his intensity, she could feel 14 months of pent up thrusts being slammed into her. Each time he slammed his dick into her she felt herself lift off the countertop. She bit down on his shoulder, looking for something to hold onto but instead she held onto his muscular arms as he pumped into her. She no longer had control over her body, weird and muffled sounds escaped her mouth while she felt like a damn had exploded between her legs, she was gushing as she rode out her orgasm. Nick felt her cum and he slowed his thrusts down to allow her the time to be lost in ecstasy.

"Nick" she yelped wanting him to look at her but he continued sliding his dick in and out of her, pulling himself all the way out and then slamming straight into her. She could see the sweat dripping down his face.

"Cum for me again, baby." He whispered with a hoarse voice. "I want that pussy poppin'" Amanda felt her body building up for the next orgasm, Nick was continued fucking her raw. Whimpers escaped her mouth as she felt him pushing himself in her faster and she felt herself begin to lose control again but this time he came with her. When he started to cum he slowed down and slowly guided himself in and out of her. Her eyes rolled back into her head, she felt nothing but pure ecstasy. All pain, worries, and bets were out of her mind. All she could feel was his strong dick inside her and her body flowing for him.

Nick rested his forehead against hers, she opened her eyes to see him with a satisfied smile and he tenderly said "Amanda…" together their chests heaved loudly and heavily, she waited for him to say something but all that escaped his sexy lips was, "mmmm". For several minutes he kept his dick inside her and leaned over her so her neck was craned at an awkward angle against the mirror. She tried to get a read on him, was he satisfied? Was he guilty? She couldn't tell until he pulled out of her and said, "I'm sweating all over you, I'm sorry." He backed up and pulled a hand towel from the shelf, he offered it to Amanda and grabbed another for himself. He wiped the sweat from his face and neck as he watched Amanda wipe her inner thighs, he wiped off his dick, balls, and thighs and looked up just in time to see Amanda slid off the counter and stumble.

He caught her before she fell, "You okay?"

"My legs are weak, I need a minute."

Nick laughed, "I'm sorry if I was too rough." He gently kissed the corner of her mouth and pulled her into his arms.

"No, I… it was…fun…good." She stammered looking down at his dick and noticing they both had yet to pull up their pants.

Nick followed her gaze and slightly blushed as he reached down to pull up his jeans and underwear. He reached to pull up her panties but she stopped him and did it herself. Nick adjusted his package before zipping up.

"Do you think they're back yet?" She asked.

"Um, I don't know. I'll go out first so they won't see you." He reached the door but turned back to meet her eyes, she looked confused but he smiled his boyish grin at her which made her smile back just as happily.

Nick quietly opened the door and was relieved to see they were all outside focused on the game. "Clear." He told her and together they walked out, he stayed inside and opened another beer. Amanda went and sat outside with the others.

"Hey 'Manda, where were you?" Fin asked.

"Went for a walk." She said and pretended to be interested in the game but all she could think about was how that man felt in her, she was fixed on fuckin' his brains out but inside her fucked hers out. She felt dizzy, like she had gone around on the merry go 'round too many times.

"And where were you?" Fin asked Nick when he joined them outside.

"Uh…went out to take a call."

"Was it Maria?" Liv asked, joining Fin's interrogation.

Nick glanced at Amanda then back at Liv, "No. It was my mom."

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That night when Nick got home he was horny as hell and wished he could call Amanda and ask her to come over. How could he ask her to be his fuck buddy? But quickly dismissed the idea and called his wife. As usual, they were both distant and barely spoke about anything other than Zara. Maria asked him several times if he was okay and each time he insisted he was fine until the last time when she asked he snapped at her and told her he wouldn't be fine if she asked him again. He kept thinking about the advice his Mom had given him but right now, coward or not, he wasn't in the mood to tell her what he had done or deal with the consequences. He rather lay in bed and think about how tight Amanda was when he could be inside her again.

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**I apologize for the delayed update. Please review and throw any ideas out at me. I want the next chapter to be pure smut. Something has to mend my broken heart and I think shopping and smut could….Review, review, review and thank you.**


	7. Chapter 7

The week following their restroom romp was exciting for Amanda and she felt it was exciting for Nick because they couldn't stop flirting; giving each other eyes or sneaking smiles. They would find reasons to touch, a pat on the arm or shoulder, Amanda would sometimes touch his chest, their fingers touched when handing files to each other. She knew the squad could tell something was up because she and Nick never gotten along like that.

But after thinking about it so much she realized the thing she couldn't let go of was how Nick took control that time they had sex and she simply surrendered to him, even though he had rejected her once before. Yes, of course, he satisfied her twice during the 10 minutes they spent in the bathroom and she loved it. She loved how aggressive and rough he was, and she knew it was mostly because of the pent up sexual frustration he harbored. She couldn't stop replaying it over in her mind.

One time, she told herself, one time with Nick Amaro is all she wanted but in her mind she saw herself taking control and fucking him. She wanted to fuck him like a woman should fuck a man whose body she deeply craved and desired. She wanted to fuck him the way his wife should, she wanted to please and satisfy Nick until he was sexually spent. But that require having sex a second time. He's married, she told herself. Sex with a married man is wrong, she told herself. But he turns me on by just looking at me, she told herself. I want to make him beg for it before I make him my bitch, she told herself.

"Hey," he called to her tenderly. She looked up at him with a cocked eyebrow and smirk, "what are you thinking about it?"

Amanda slightly blushed, "Oh nothing…" she smirked at him again.

"Well that nothing you're thinking about… must be real good because you were smiling the whole time."

"Mmm… it was good."

"Yeah?" he said and looked straight into her eyes with his own happy, puppy dog eyes and he clenched his jaw before giving her a closed mouth smile.

Amanda saw this as her chance to take control, "You doin' anything tonight?" she whispered.

"Only you." He kept his eyes pierced onto hers and licked his lips.

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Later that same night Amanda went home to change into something a little more suggestive and purposely showed up late to the bar. Nick smiled at her as she approached him, she saw him look her up and down, then remembered his manners and he pulled out her barstool and ordered her a Rum and Coke.

"Actually, make it a Whiskey Sour." She told the bartender. She looked at Nick and he gave her a feigned pout but nodded in acceptance. Amanda liked that he knew what he usual order was but allowing him to order her drink was giving him control and she wasn't ready for that just yet. She gave seductive glances in between their small talk. When she was almost done with her drink she began to put her plan in motion. She purposely leaned forward to give him a better look at her plunging neckline; she took off her small jean jacket even though it was chilly in the bar. She let the strap to her cami fall off her shoulder when she hung it on the back of her stool. She glanced back at Nick and his eyes were on her shoulders then her breasts, Amanda felt the chill in the air and knew her nipples were getting hard. Nick glanced away obviously trying to shake off the effect she was having on him. Amanda reached out and pulled on his tie, smoothed it down over his shirt and let her hands trail down to his belt buckle, she fingered the square a few times. She reached out and ran her fingers over his slightly calloused hands, pulled the tip of his middle finger to her mouth and grazed it across her lips before she slowly took it in her mouth. When she looked up at him his lips were slightly parted and his eyes were fixed on his finger in her mouth, "Let's get out of here." He nodded with a smug look and paid their tab.

Outside in the parking lot she allowed him to open her door and once he slid onto his seat Amanda's mouth was on his neck, sucking the spot slightly to left of his Adam's apple and his jaw line, she ran her hand up his thigh and lightly over his package up to his hardened abs. When he tried to move his hands to her waist she swatted them away, "Drive to my place."

Nick swallowed hard, "Okay."

Together they walked up to her apartment and once inside he grabbed her hips and pulled her into him, wanting her to feel he was getting turned on. She allowed him to run his hands over her ass but turned her face away when he tried to kiss her. She felt him caressing her ass, "Are you not wearing panties?" he asked. Amanda cocked her brow at him and pushed him down onto the sofa.

She straddled him and Nick feel the heat radiating between her thighs onto his crotch, he tried to run his hands up her thighs but she stopped him by slowly grinding a figure eight on him with her hips, she leaned forward and gently sucked on his earlobes, she ran her tongue over his lips while she took off his tie and undid the top four buttons of his shirt. Amanda grazed his nipples with her thumbs before she kissed them and licked from his chest up to his neck where she teased him more. She held his hands against the sofa to prevent him from touching her.

She got off of him and sat on the love seat opposite of him. She slowly ran her tongue over her upper lip and looked at his crotch, "Sorry." She bit down on her lip with a smile. Nick looked down and saw she had left his crotch damp with her juices and the head of his dick attempted to tear through his slacks. When he looked back to her his eyes immediately went to her widely spread legs and now he knew for sure she wasn't wear any panties. She heard him groan and noticed his clenched jaw. She pulled her skirt up a little more to give him a better view; she licked her fingers before she began rubbing his clit.

Nick stood up but before he could move she stopped, "You stay there." Nick dropped to his knees and watched her as she began working on her clit again. When she looked back at him he was on all fours slowly crawling to her. "Uh uh," she shook her head at him and he stopped.

"Amanda…" he said with a slight whine.

"What?" She further teased him by circling the opening of her pussy.

He groaned, "Let me please."

She stopped pleasuring herself but left her legs spread to give him full view, "I'm so fuckin' horny right now, ugh, I need a big, fat dick inside me…I need to feel it inside me." She thrust her hips at him and he quickly crawled over to her, just as he reached her knees she closed her legs and stood up.

He looked up at her from the floor, "Amanda…I want you, gimme that pussy."

She moaned loudly, groped her breast and teased her nipples through her cami. Nick stood up, Amanda grabbed his face with one hand and his ass with the other while pushing her tits and pelvis against him, and she kissed him hard and pushed him back down onto the sofa. Nick unbuttoned the rest of his shirt; she helped him pull it off but stopped his hands when he tried to unbuckle his belt. He moaned with frustration but she silenced him by tracing the outside of his lips with her tongue she gently tugged on his bottom lip. When he dipped his tongue in her mouth she nipped at it with her teeth before she let him slip it all the way in then sucked it hard.

She slid down on her knees and massaged his thighs and knees, she finally undid his pants and he sighed with a mixture of relief and pleasure, his dick was standing straight up through his boxer briefs, she rubbed her cheek and mouth against it. She helped him out of his underwear and he moaned loudly now that his dick was free and unwrapped from his clothes. Amanda pulled off her top and pushed her tits against his bare chest as she kissed him aggressively. She straddled him again and bounced on his dick, slapping his face with her tits. Nick lifted her hips in an attempt to slide inside her, she grabbed his hands and placed them on her hips. She pushed her tits in his face; Nick took one in his mouth and teased it with his teeth. Amanda let him grab them in his hands and tossed her head back in pleasure as he made out with her tits, switching from one to the other every few seconds.

"Nick" she moaned his name, "I love how your cock is throbbing against me, baby, will it feel just as good inside me?"

"Let me fuck you, baby. Let me give you my dick, I promise it will feel good. I want your pussy… mmmm… so wet, so tight and warm."

"You want to fuck me?"

"Yes, I want to fuck you, hard and raw. Fuck… I'm so fuckin' hard for you."

"You gonna give me this big dick?" she asked as she squeezed it.

"Mmmhmm" he muffled as she continued to make out with her tits.

"That's my dick?"

"Yes, it's all yours. Baby, gimme that pussy… please… I need you." He groaned loudly and pushed her hips harder down on his rock hard dick. Amanda stood up and let her skirt drop to her feet, then straddled him again but hovering over his long dick. "Amanda… please" He whined and moaned her name.

Now that he begged for it she gave in and together they moaned and grunted as she crashed down on top of him, letting her pussy sink all the way down his dick. Amanda took the control she wanted, somehow they ended up on floor and she really began to ride him. She switched between rocking her hips slowly to hiding him like he was an untamed stallion. She bounced, grinded, and rocked on him letting his dick roughly slam into her g spot. When she felt herself close to cumming she adjusted positions, she wanted him to cum first. They slapped their bodies against each other, she swung one leg over his body and began riding him in reverse cowgirl, she bent forward to give him the view of her plunging down on his dick, "Yeah, baby. Ohhh fuck…I'm gonna cum." Amanda felt her own walls closing in tight on his dick, "Me too…fuck…your dick…ohhh Nick…" He grabbed her hips pulling her down harder on his cock, he kept their bodies stuck together and rocked into her several more times as they both came, gushing together. They grunted, moaned, and whimpered through the waves of pleasure that continued to rain down. When they both rode out the orgasm, Nick turned to his side pulling Amanda with him.

He wasn't ready to pull out of her; he wouldn't be ready until his dick stopped throbbing. His chest heaved against her back, her hair was his face and he deeply inhaled it and the scent of her body. He held her breasts in his hand and Amanda placed her hand over his, she lay there with him letting her breath her entire being into his body. She knew she gave him what he had been lacking; she knew he needed a woman to consume him and to be consumed by him. She melted into his arms and he held her tightly with his dick still inside her.

After several minutes he moved her hair from his face and sucked tenderly on her neck, "Can I go again?" he asked tenderly.

Amanda turned to him with surprise; every guy she'd done it with was done after he first came. She smiled and asked, "Can you go again?"

Nick laughed and bit down on her neck with some force. He pulled out of her and got up off the floor, helping her up as well. He pulled her body close to his and kissed her long and hard, he felt his cock grow harder and press it into her belly. He lifted her up; she wrapped her legs around his waist, kissed and licked her collarbone before setting her down on the kitchen table.

She admired his thick, long, hard dick, "Why did you tell me you had a small dick that time we were at the bar?"

"I got dick for days, baby."

"No, I have dick for days. It's mine remember." She smiled at him haughtily.

"Mmmhmmm… you can have my dick as long as you let it live in this pussy" he slipped two fingers inside her. "'Manda you're so fuckin' tight… damn!"

She giggled when he bit and sucked on the inside of her thighs, he gently guided her to lie back on the table. He lifted her right leg over his shoulder and fingered her clit, sliding his finger up and down her slit, he pushed her left knee up so her foot rested on the edge of the table. He leaned over to her belly and gave it soft kisses before he fully thrust himself inside her. She screamed out with pleasure and pain, he continued thrusting into her from a diagonal angle while he simultaneously rubbed her clit. With his free hand he lifted her hips slightly so she could clench her ass as he rammed into her, repeatedly he pulled in and out of her, loving every word and sound that escaped her mouth. "Oh shit" she repeated, "mmm Nick, your dick…I feel you…so deep in me." She reveled in the pleasure with her hands above her head, her eyes shut tight and her mouth opened wide with pleasure, she released sounds that were music to his ears and he quickly pummeled into her and flicked her clit until she couldn't control the rivers that flowed for him.

He felt her body was weak from the orgasm he just gave her; he lifted her up off in the table and carried her down the hall. "Left or right?" he asked.

"Right" she said before she initiated him in another tongue twisting kiss.

Nick laid her down on the bed; she rolled over to make room for him so he lay next to her on his side. His heart rate was speeding and his cock was still throbbing ebbing for release. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, are you?"

"No, I'm not… I need you, baby. I wanna make your pussy rain for me." He said tenderly in her ear, kissing the side of her face and mouth. "I wanna bust it so good in you." He covered her mouth with full wet kisses, licking down to her neck and stomach, he sucked on her hips, turned her onto her side and bit her butt cheek with heavy pressure. He slid his finger into her pussy and spread the wetness over her ass crack, he cupped her cheeks in his hands and spread them apart, he gently ran his tongue over the spot that separates her ass and pussy, slowly he moved his way up to her ass hole and swirled his tongue over the opening, he smiled with satisfaction when he felt her shake with pleasure. He moved back up to her neck and softly kissed her shoulder blades.

Nick lay on his side and pulled Amanda down on her back, he swung her legs over his hips so the entrance of her slit was against his dick. "Keep your legs together over me, like this." He kissed her mouth slowly, slipped two fingers inside of her before he slowly entered her; he pushed himself into her using more pressure with each thrust. When he got a rhythm going he felt her arch her back and soon she was moaning again... she moaned from the friction he created, by fucking her from that angle the head of his dick slid over her g-spot. Nick knew this was pleasing for her but he'd have to fuck her like that for an hour before she would cum. He let go of her legs and rubbed her pelvis, slowly creeping his fingers down to her clit. He put the pressure of his fingers against her clit and her moaning grew louder, her breathing quickened, as did his. He felt like he would cum from just hearing how turned on and pleased she was. He picked up the pace of his thrusts and his fingers, he felt her walls clamped down on his dick making his access tighter, he tried to hold it in a little longer. He pushed his dick into her harder and rougher with more power so her body was slightly lifting off the bed. Her walls collapsed and she crumbled down, drenching his balls with her juices, she whimpered as Nick kept fucking her until he felt himself finally bust inside her. He bit down on her neck and grunted into her hair but still rocked in her riding out his own orgasm. He loved being inside a pussy and now couldn't wrap his mind around having the ability to not have it for 14 months.

He kept his face buried in her hair as he came down from his high, trying to fight away the guilty conscience that was attempting to enter his thoughts. He slapped her ass and said into her hair, "this is my booty."

Finally, he gained enough control of himself to get out of her bed and stretch. He scanned the floor for his clothes.

"What are you looking for?" Amanda mumbled with hooded eyes that threatened to shut from exhaustion.

"Clothes… nevermind, I took them off in the living room." He left the room in search for his clothes.

Amanda sat up and wondered why he was getting dressed. They just fucked but that doesn't mean he couldn't stay the night, it was almost morning anyway. She heard him come back down the hall so threw herself back in bed and pretended to be asleep.

"Amanda?" he sat on the edge of the bed, "you awake, baby?"

"Hmmm?" she grunted with annoyance.

"I'm gonna take off."

"Okay." She kept her face buried in her sheet.

"My mom stayed with my daughter and I should probably check on them."

"Lock the door behind you, please."

"Amanda…" he waited several moments, unsure of what to do. He felt something was off, was she upset? Why would she be upset? He just made her cum three times in one night… he leaned over and kissed her forehead. Locked the door on his way out and drove home.

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On a slow afternoon, Nick sat in the cribs Skyping with Maria, over the previous weeks he tried to go back to how things were with wife before Amanda got into his head but it was hard and often felt forced. He knew it would be impossible to go back to how their marriage was now that he had been fucking Amanda at least twice a week over the past two months. He was half listening to her drone on about her Commanding Officer and he could care less about the conversations they had. He interrupted her asking, "Have you fucked him?"

"What?!"

"Nothin'"

"Why would you say that?"

"You talk nonstop about this fucktard like if I care what he says to you. I kept asking myself why you talk about him so much but then it hit me, you're fucking him."

"Nothing like that has happened."

"Then what has happened?"

"Nick…please stop."

"I gotta hang up."

"No, don't you dare." She hissed at him and looked side to side to make sure no one was close enough to hear her, "I should be the one concerned about you fuckin' around. I'm sure you have these whores throwing themselves at you and you're a married man going to bars, what married man does that? You don't even tell me you love me or you miss me!"

"Ever stop to realize why I stopped saying it? I stopped because I wanted to see if you would tell me for a change. But you have yet to say it. I get it, I get the hint. " Nick ended the Skype session and tossed his iPad on the bunk he was sitting on. He lay back on the bed, loosened his tie, he ran his fingers through his hair and slightly tugged at it. He heard the door open and punched the bunk above him. "This is some bullshit!" he said angrily.

"Nick? Everything okay?"

"Go away."

"Well fuck you too." She let the door slam shut and opened her locker.

He sighed loudly, "Amanda… I'm sorry."

She grabbed her purse and slammed her locker shut.

"Amanda?"

She flipped him off and left the precinct. She didn't want to be home later when she knew he would come knocking and begging her to forgive him. She loved it when he begged but tonight she was going to do her and not worry about anything or anyone else. She hoped into a cab and gave him the address to a restaurant in the Bronx.

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**Thoughts? Review please…I think reviews make me write faster… **

**Oh and I hope you liked the quick update!**


	8. Chapter 8

**At the end of the previous chapter, I mentioned my thinking/reasoning behind the dirty talk. I will try my best to not include it in this chapter. **

…**but my fingers type whatever my brain tells them to, I have no real control LOL I thought I was ready for a time jump but there's a few more things I would like to include before I bring Maria home.**

**Also, I'm sorry for the late update. Life happens to me sometimes (rarely).**

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A few days had passed since Nick last left Amanda in the middle of the night. She had been giving him the cold shoulder but she wasn't exactly sure why. She knew he was married, she knew they weren't in a relationship, and she knew what they were doing was just a physical thing so she didn't understand why it bothered her so much that he left after they had sex.

She sat at her desk with her head rested in her hand and exhaled as she looked over at his empty desk. What did she really expect him to do? Profess his abiding love and ask her to be the mother of his next child? All she really wanted was for him to snuggle up to her, hold her in his arms, and make her feel safe so she could fall asleep peacefully. She wanted him to make her feel wanted for more than just a good fuck. But it would probably be best to allow things die down between them before she ended up hurt and in the middle of his family drama. She nodded her head as she decided she would try her best to resist his charming ways.

She continued the afternoon as usual, trying to casually avoid Nick but not in such a way that would arise suspicion. She was out interviewing a witness when she received Nick's text asking her out for drinks after shift, Amanda ignored the message. Twenty minutes later on the way back to the station she received another text from him with several question marks. She smiled and powered down her phone. She liked knowing she had him waiting on her.

"Hey." Nick acknowledged Fin when he sat at the desk across from him.

"What's up, Nick?"

"Not much, man. Getting ready to call it a day. Where have you guys been?"

"Out interviewing some…" Fin noticed Nick's eyes focused on his partner, "witnesses".

Nick nodded at Fin and walked past Amanda, slightly bumping into her arm and whispered "cribs"

She waited a few minutes, and then walked back to see what he wanted.

"Did you need something?" she asked, trying to remain professional.

He sat up from the bed, "Hey, did you get my text?" he asked her tenderly.

"No. Sorry, I had my phone off."

"Feel up for some drinks?"

Amanda chewed on her lip briefly, "I can't."

"Because…?" his face was scrunched in confusion.

Amanda chuckled, "Because I can't." She turned and walked out of the cribs.

"Amanda?" Nick called after her but she ignored him.

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Amanda sat a table illuminated by a dim yellow light, the air was thick with smoke, and it stunk like scotch. She kept her sunglasses on, her leg bounced in anticipation, in her hand she held a Royal Flush. Her mind kept drifting back to Nick; she came to this bar with the intention of thinking about anything that wasn't Nick. He was under her skin and she hated it.

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He had her against the wall, used his nose to nuzzle her neck, he inhaled her deeply before he sucked on her neck. Amanda tried to free herself from his grip, he held her hands above her head, and he pressed his body into hers as he grazed his lips over her face.

"I can't." she whispered to him.

"You can." he whispered back to her.

Amanda bit down on her lip trying to muffle the low moan she let out when his tongue swirled on her neck. "Nick… I can't."

"Shhh"

"I have to leave."

"No..." His mouth was hungrily on hers.

She turned her face away from him. Nick let her hands drop as he took a step back, stood with his hands on his hips, and sighed heavily.

"Did I do something wrong?"

"No."

"Then what changed? You were all for this before."

Amanda smiled at him and cursed herself. Nick looked incredibly sexy standing there with his hands on his hips and his breathing slightly heavy. She walked out of the cribs without saying another word.

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The following weekend Nick and his basketball buddies went to the usual bar after their game. Nick was a little pissed that Amanda didn't show up, she had been attending his games on a regular basis and now all of a sudden she was acting weird and busy. He knew something was up with her; he was tempted to ask Ashley if Amanda mentioned anything he might have done wrong but then realized if he asked it would be confirming that they hooked up.

Nick had been so consumed with his thoughts he didn't notice Amanda show up at the bar, she had managed to slip into a booth with Ashley, Frank and some other guy before he noticed her. Who was this guy? He asked himself. Is she fucking him? She never mentioned having a boyfriend, which this person obviously was, because she let his hands roam her back and thighs, she let him hold her hand. An unfamiliar feeling rose deep from within his gut, anger and something else he couldn't name. He wanted to keep his cool so he went to the back of the bar to distract himself by playing pool with a few guys and girls.

When Amanda scanned the bar for Nick, she was surprised to see he had disappeared from the stool where he was originally sitting. She tried to see where he was but only realized he was playing pool when she heard a girl scream his name through giggles then loudly shout at him for poking her with his stick. Amanda rolled her eyes. This unknown girl immediately annoyed her. She pulled Tanner to a pool table near Nick. She let him hold her hips, stand behind her, and show her how to aim the pool stick. She caught a glimpse of Nick in her peripheral vision; it looked like he was scowling at them.

She took her shot and waved at him, "Hey, I didn't know you were here."

"Really? I'm here every Saturday afternoon…you know after my game that you usually come to. And now that I think about it, you usual come with me to this bar."

"Don't be an ass." She sassed him.

"Who's your friends?"

"Oh, this is Tanner." She turned to Tanner, "Tanner, this is Nick, one of the detectives I work with".

Nick reached for Tanner's extended hand, "Tanner…that's not a very masculine name".

"Nice to meet you, Nick."

Amanda interrupted the men, "Who's your friend?" she jerked her head toward the beautifully Latina hugging Nick's arm.

Nick turned to the woman and gave her his boyish grin, "This beautiful, young lady is Nikki".

Nikki briefly released Nick's arm to offer Amanda a handshake.

"Hi Nikki, I'm Amanda. How do you know Nick?"

Nikki turned to Nick, "Our names go perfect together".

Nick nodded at Nikki and turned his attention back to Amanda, "How do you know Tanner?"

"Amanda, am I missing something here?" Tanner asked her with concern.

"Nope." She smiled and pulled him back to their pool table.

"You two up for a friendly game with us?" Amanda and Tanner accepted Nick's offer.

Amanda felt herself getting more annoyed with each turn they each took. She began ignoring Tanner and paying more attention to how Nick allowed Nikki's hands to roam his body. Nikki drew the final straw of Amanda's patience when she flirtingly and playfully poked Nick's crotch with her pool stick.

Amanda grabbed Tanner by his shirt collar and roughly kissed him, Tanner's hands went down to cup Amanda's ass. She peaked over her shoulder and smiled at Nick; he stood staring at her with a clenched jaw and flared nostrils.

"Let's take this to your place." Tanner grinned at her. Amanda nodded her head.

"Let me use the ladies room first." She gave his thigh a pat and then walked away thinking he was a jerk and she had no desire to hook up with this metro city slicker. She closed the door to the bathroom and leaned against it. Amanda took a couple of deep breaths, trying to clear her head and figure out what she was doing. She laughed at herself and felt slightly embarrassed about her high school behavior. She felt someone push on the door. "Hey!" she yelled.

The person pushed on the door a little harder, "Amanda". It was Nick.

Her stomach flipped and twisted at the sound of his voice. In a split second, he had her sitting on the sink with her back against the sink mirror. She felt his mouth on her neck and his hands entangled in her hair, he bit down and sucked hard on her neck. "Nick" his name escaped her lips in the form of a yelp. He groaned a response she couldn't make out, his hands held her face and he roughly scavenged her mouth with his soft lips. He sucked on her tongue deeply before he swirled it with his. She felt his hand move down and his fingers search her slick slit, she heard him mess with his belt and unzip his zipper. He briefly took his hands from her body as he pushed his jeans down to his knees, he took a step back and quickly slid a condom over his engorged member, he pushed her skirt up and swiftly pulled her panties to the side before he plunged into her. Amanda let out a loud sigh, not expecting him to give her all of him at once.

"This is mine," he whispered tenderly into her ear as he repeatedly thrust into her. He held her hips still as he picked up his pace and bucked his hips into her.

Amanda felt his power, she was turned on by his aggressiveness and the anger caused by his jealousy. She felt herself near the edge as she pictured the scowl he had when he saw her kiss Tanner. His tender and sweet voice echoed in her ears saying, "This is mine." She wrapped her legs around his waist as she felt her walls collapse and then explode with wet pleasure, he pushed himself deep inside her a few more times before she heard him grunt several times into her neck, pull her hair and rock his hips into her until he emptied himself.

She stayed on the sink as Nick hovered over her with his hands resting against the mirror behind her, his eyes were closed as he breathed heavily, trying to catch his breath. She watched his chest rise and fall as her heartbeat pounded in her ears. Amanda closed her eyes, bit down on her bottom lip as she reveled in bliss. Minutes passed before she felt his lips on her cheek, he kissed her forehead and then her lips. She opened her eyes and smiled at him.

"Don't ever make me that jealous again." He held her chin and kissed her lips again.

"Don't give me reason to make you jealous" She cocked her eyebrow at him as she slid off the sink "and don't bring Nikki around again unless you want me to use my Taser."

"On her?"

"On you." She jabbed his ribs with her finger.

Nick pulled her into him and hugged her tightly, "lo siento mi hermosa reina" (Sorry my beautiful queen) He moaned softly with relief, happy to feel so close to her again. "Vamos déjame alimento." (Let's go. Let me feed you.) Amanda followed him as he led her out of the bar by the hand. He eyes avoided Nikki but he heard Tanner call out to Amanda, which made him squeeze her hand tighter.

He drove them to her place while she called in for take-out; they had slow sex and then shared a Chinese dinner picnic style on her living room floor and watched a Sex in the City marathon. Amanda rested her head on his chest with her body curled up close to his, he draped his arm around her and petted Frannie, who was curled up on the other side of him.

The sound of Nick's phone ruined their intimate night. She peaked at the caller and saw Maria's picture. He hit the ignore icon and then called his Mom, asking after Zara and if she needed him to pick her up. Amanda heard the little girls' sad voice ask her Dad to pick her up and take her home. Nick said something to her in Spanish before he hung up. He hugged Amanda tightly and kissed her temple, "I gotta head out".

Without taking her eyes off the TV she simply said, "See you at work".

"Amanda?"

"See you at work."

"Can you look at me?"

"What Nick?" she turned to face him.

"Can I come over tomorrow?

"I might not be home."

He sighed with frustration, patted Frannie on the head and left to pick up his daughter.

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The next morning, Nick and Zara ate breakfast together while they Skyped with Maria. Nick kept quiet and out of Maria's view. When Zara was finished eating, she left to go play in her room. Nick felt awkward as Maria forced small talk.

"I should probably get going. I promised Zara we'd go to the park."

"Nick, you seem so distant lately. I love you."

"I am distant because we are distant. I don't really know what to say to you right now."

"My tour is almost over; I'll be home in two more months."

Before Nick could respond, Zara zoomed passed him with a medium sized bag. "Daddy, this is all the stuff I want to take to Aunt Livia's. Can I please? Please?" she pleaded.

"Yes, baby, nothing else."

Zara rushed over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck, "Thank you so much Daddy!" she kissed his cheek and ran back to her room.

"Aunt Livia?" Maria asked.

"Yeah, that's what she calls Liv."

"Why is she going over there? Do you visit her often?"

"Yeah, we hang out sometimes outside of work. She and Zara like hanging out and doing stuff."

"Daddy, is Amanda going to be there? I really want to be her friend." Zara yelled from the hallway outside her bedroom.

"Yeah, babe."

"Why are you letting her hang out with these women? How can she be friends with adults?"

"Look, Maria you aren't here. Liv likes Zara and Zara likes her. She needs to be around other women. I can't expect my Mom to be on call 24/7."

"Nick, you can't throw that in my face. I didn't choose to be here." Maria yelled.

"You did. You chose to go back to Iraq, you chose Iraq over your family. So now you have no room to get upset when your family chooses other people over you."

"Have you chosen other people over us?" she asked quietly.

"Have you?" he shot back and when she didn't answer he simply said, "me too" and ended the session.

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**I hope you enjoyed this chapter, please let me know what your thoughts and opinions in the review section. I greatly appreciate the feedback. Tomorrow afternoon I plan to write another chapter before I bring Maria home. Any ideas/scenarios for Maria's homecoming?**


	9. Chapter 9

Nick drove to Liv's apartment with Zara in the backseat of his truck; in his rearview mirror, he could see her bopping her head, and singing along with Taylor Swift to a song he always mistakenly called "Back space". Zara was always quick to remind him the song was "Blank space" with a know-it-all eye roll.

His conversation, if you could call it that, with Maria replayed repeatedly in his mind. Deep in his gut he knew she had cheated on him, it was just something he was certain of. A part of him hoped he was wrong, but then there was the fact that he had been unfaithful as well. Two wrongs don't equal a right, he told himself. He tried to think back to why he initially started this…he wasn't even sure what to call it. Were they hooking up? Were they sleeping together? Probably not sleeping together because they had never actually slept together. Whatever it was that they were doing, he tried to remember why it initially happened. The image of Amanda's bruised butt and lower back crept into his mind; she had sent a picture of it to him earlier in the morning.

Guilt began to set in as he remembered when his Mom told him to express what he was going through with his wife. Instead, he chose to give in to temptation and not mention anything to Maria. How much of a coward would he be to tell his wife, over the phone, he wasn't in love with her anymore? To make it even worse, she was in Iraq. Either way he felt he was a coward, his wife was in Iraq and he cheated on her.

Zara pulled Nick out of his self-reproach when she let out a high squeal, "Zara!" he yelled.

"Sorry Daddy! I'm okay. I'm just so excited!" she gushed.

"You scared me, baby."

"I said sorry…"

"What are you excited about?" he asked tenderly.

"Sadie's Mom texted you, she's letting Sadie have a sleep over and she invited me, can I go Daddy? Please, please, Daddy, can I go?"

"Baby, don't beg. When we get to Liv's I'll call her Mom and find out what's going on."

"Is that a yes?" she asked with a face full of worry.

Nick looked back at Zara with a face that let the little girl know she was to drop the begging and whining.

Nick let Zara off the truck and walked her up to Liv's apartment; he stayed in the hall and called Sadie's Mom. After a short conversation, he found out the details he needed and agreed to drop Zara off at their house later in the day.

After greeting Liv and Amanda, he smiled at Zara and she rushed toward him, hugging his waist and hanging onto his legs, she smothered his lower belly with kisses and gushed over him being the best dad ever.

"What's going on?" Liv asked with an amused smile.

"Daddy's letting me go to a sleepover!" Zara twirled around the living room and fell back onto the sofa saying, "Isn't he so dreamy?"

Nick and the women laughed over how animated his daughter could be. He and Zara spent the afternoon with Liv and Amanda; they prepared lunch, played a few rounds of Sight Word Bingo, and laughed as Zara performed song and dance for them. Zara was a natural performer and ate up all the attention that came along with it.

At one point, he found himself alone with Amanda when Liv took Zara to the room to show the little girl some new bracelets she bought. Nick locked eyes with her and they both exchanged playful smiles. He moved closer to her on the sofa and gently kissed her cheek, "I'm sorry I hurt you", he cooed into her ear.

"I'm fine," she whispered so low he barely heard her.

"Let me make you feel better?" he whispered back as he nibbled her earlobe. "Go with me to drop off Zara and then I'll take you home."

Amanda pulled back as she heard Zara run down Liv's hall; she slightly nodded her head in agreement. Nick stood up and pretended to look at Liv's movie collection. When he sensed she was in the living room, he asked, "Why do you buy movies and not watch them?" He fingered the movie cases still wrapped in plastic.

"I'll get to them someday."

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Nick unlocked the door to his house and stepped out of the way to allow Amanda entrance. All thoughts and feelings of guilt were gone from his conscious, he knew he shouldn't be bringing her to his house but he lived closer to Zara's friend than she did. And right now, all he really cared about was his hands being on this woman's soft, beautiful skin and tasting every inch of her. Once he closed the door, he walked up behind her and pulled her into him, inhaling her hair. The scent of her made his blood rush down south of his waist. He lifted up the back of her shirt, kneeled down behind her, and pulled her jeans down slightly to kiss the bruise he left on her lower back.

"I'm sorry." He whispered as he ran his hands over the outline of her hips and grabbed her ass in both his hands. He pulled down her jeans a little more and kissed the dark bruises. "Perdóname por favor" (please forgive me). Amanda took a few steps to the sofa and laid down on her belly, he followed her and continued tenderly kissing her backside. "I didn't mean to be so rough, te deseo mucho, lo siento" (I wanted you so much, I'm sorry).

"It's okay, Nick." She reached for his hand and softly kissed it. He traced the outline of the bruises with his fingers, he felt insensitive of her, he should have known the way he had her against the sink the night before was uncomfortable and painful for her, instead all he had been worried about was the desire and jealously he felt when seeing her with another man.

"Lo siento, mami, I was so selfish." Nick scooped her up in his arms and carried her to his bed. He pulled off her jeans while she pulled her top over her head and threw it to the floor. Nick unclasped her bra and suckled on her breasts, gripping them firmly in his hands. Amanda could feel his erection poking her thigh; she grabbed at his belt while he pulled his shirt off, and she unzipped him. He stood up to shake his jeans from his ankles; he smiled at her when he noticed she was staring at his bulge. He grabbed it in his hand and asked, "You want this?"

Amanda bit down on her bottom lip and nodded her head at him. He bit down on his own lip and hovered over her body, grazing his lips over her ribs and gliding his tongue along her collarbone. She reached into his boxer briefs and pulled out his hardened cock. Much to his surprise, she flipped him on his back and shimmied down his bed until her mouth was near his cock. He clenched it and they laughed when it hit her on the cheek.

She ran her hand up and down his length, circled the head with her finger before she flicked it with her tongue. "I've never really looked at it all the times we had sex." She admired his length, the few soft veins on his shaft, and the moist ridges of the circumcised head.

"That's because we were too eager for it to be inside you."

"Would it be mean if I got you all worked up and didn't let you in?" she smiled slyly at him.

Nick's eyes grew wide, "That wouldn't be nice at all…I'd probably cry".

She ran her tongue around the head, he tasted slightly salty but she continued to put all of him inside her mouth, she looked at his hips, quietly hummed and thanked his God for the perfect v-lines that led to his dick from his hips, his abdomen was defined and tight just like his chest and arms.

She looked up at him-his mouth was slightly open. Amanda knew he was clearly enjoying this. His eyes met hers, "You wouldn't be that mean, would you?"

She only smirked at him as she started slowly grinding her hips against his leg while she sucked on him with intense pressure. She bopped her head fast and she tightened her mouth around his throbbing dick. His breathing was picking up and Amanda knew he was close to the edge, and then she stopped.

Nick opened his eyes, "Why did you stop?"

Amanda silently counted to ten before she put her mouth back on him and sucked, she stopped a second time "no, no" he said with worry and thrust his hips at her; she counted to ten and continued to suck, nibble and jerk at him. The third time she stopped she had him whining her name and telling her to stop playing with him.

Nick had his hand in her hair to prevent her from stopping so she sucked him off hard and fast until she felt his body tense up and she heard him grunt until his warm cum oozed into her mouth. Some of his cum seeped out and dripped from the corner of her mouth. She closed her eyes and savored the taste of him as she swallowed his juices.

He let her know his approval when a tender, "mmm" escaped his lips.

Amanda climbed up to him licking her lips and was surprised when he pulled her into him and pecked her lips, she allowed him to wrap his arms around her, she wanted to be in his arms. He nibbled on her ear and neck. He poked her side and she squirmed away with giggles.

"You're gonna have to do that more often," he said into her hair.

"Only when you deserve it," she arched her brow at him with a playful grin.

He pulled her on her back and climbed on top of her, wedged his knees between her legs and had her legs spread open and resting on his thighs. He dipped his head down to her belly, littered it with wet kisses, and then sucked the tender skin that led to her hips; she ran her hands through his dark, almost black hair. She could tell he hadn't trimmed it in the last couple of months because the ends were beginning to curl, she thought it looked sexy. When he pulled his head up and sat back on his legs, she could feel the pressure of him between her thighs. He rubbed up and down the outside of her thighs and sat up on his knees, "I'm tore between fucking you with my mouth and fucking you with my…" he pushed his erection into her inner thigh. Amanda responded with a push of her hips and a moan. He grinned devilishly at her knowing what she wanted but remembered the way she teased him before, "My Mom always said to eat before I play…" Amanda giggled as he tickled her thighs and spread her legs wider.

She caught her breath in her throat the moment she felt his cool tongue swipe at her clit, circle it and then quickly flick at it. She moaned when he pushed two fingers inside her and she felt them go straight to her G-spot, she felt him hitting her G-spot and flicking her clit simultaneously, both sensations had her moaning and yelping his name. She tried to wiggle away from him as her orgasm rapidly built up but he held her hips down firmly with his free hand. Nick twisted, rubbed, and jabbed at her G-spot with his long fingers; he was determined to get her off with a pop. With his strong tongue, he flicked at her clit, and then sucked on it when she was only able to yelp. He loved that he had her past the point of moaning pleasure and listened to her sounds of ecstasy as she exploded and gushed onto his fingers. She felt him lapping up her juices and it sent sensations down her spine, her back arched in response to him. When she began to come down from her high, she felt her lips curl into a pleasurable smile and her eyes remained closed as she reveled in his touch.

After several moments, she opened her eyes and beamed at him. She thought to herself how irresistible he was at that moment; he looked at her like a little puppy dog waiting for a head pat. She grabbed onto his ears, pulled his face to hers, and then planted a full-mouthed kiss on his lips. "I swear your tongue has superpowers." He immediately responded by dipping his tongue into her mouth and circling her tongue with his. Firmly, he sucked on her tongue before she felt his lips on her neck. He pinched the sensitive skin with his lips, she felt him positioning his leg between her thighs again.

"You wet for me?" he asked as his fingered her slit and smiled when he felt how wet she still was. Nick got up from the bed and sucked her off his finger; he went to his dresser and came back with a box of condoms.

Amanda vaguely remembered him putting one on the night before, she wanted to ask him about it but the thought slipped away when she saw he was fully erect, the head was moist and the few veins on his dick were fully engorged, she watched him slide the condom over his delicious penis that resembled a long, thick stemmed mushroom. She never cared for mushrooms before but right now, it was her favorite fungi. Her body trembled in anticipation, she lived for the moments when he first slid into her…for her, that feeling was indescribable but she liked to think it's what heaven would feel like.

Nick kneeled on the bed and grinned when Amanda climbed up on all fours and peeked at him over her shoulder. Nick leaned down and placed soft kisses on her bruised backside and slowly slid into her, both held their breath until he stuffed his entire length into her and gently rocked his hips. Amanda let out a small cry when he pulled out of her; she desperately wanted him inside her. Nick held her hips steady and poked her opening with the head of his dick, she moaned with frustration and gave him a deadly look over her shoulder, he chuckled, grabbed her hips tightly as he thrust deeply into her. She let out a hiss as pleasure took over her face. Each time he sprung into her, she backed her ass into him; he playfully spanked her cheeks. He felt the need to change positions, as he was not yet ready to explode in her.

He pulled out of her and flipped her over on her back, lifted her knees to hold them together and placed her feet flat against his chest; he slid back into her, which elicited a pleasurable eye roll from her. In this position, he was able to thrust into her effortlessly; he picked up his pace as he held her knees together. Amanda let out mumbled moans and "fucks" as he pounded into her. She was tight to begin with but with her knees held closed, she had an even tighter grip on his cock. He felt her tighten even more as her moans turned to whimpers, "cum for me" he said between his own grunts. He slammed into her a few more times before she caved and gripped her hands over Nick's for something to hold onto. He felt her warm cum drench his dick and thighs. He panted and tried to catch his breath while she came down from her orgasm. His upper body was drenched in sweat and his chest heaved for air, his dick was throbbing and still hard enough to drill through a metal door.

Nick took a few steps back from the bed and pulled off the condom, letting it drop to the floor. He moved for the box he left on the floor near the bed and used his teeth to tear open a new one. Before he slid it on, he pulled Amanda by the legs to the edge of the bed, "What are you doing?" she asked through giggles.

"Getting ready to fuck you", he gave her his irresistible boyish grin as he reached down and dipped his fingers into her, making sure she was still wet enough. She was laying there with her legs spread wide open for him; it made him even hornier seeing that her pussy was still seeping with cum. "You're so sexy." He quietly told her as he rolled the condom down his length.

Quickly he plunged his dick into her without warning, he smiled as she screamed from the pleasure; he knew she was still sensitive from her last orgasm but still pummeled into her. He held her legs up, straight in the air; he held them together by the ankles and reveled in the sensation of her clenched so tightly around him. A few thrusts in, he grunted loudly feeling himself about to bust at any moment.

"Nick, oh God, it feels so big like this", she whimpered and let out more screams each time he drilled into her. He continued to work in her; every movement ignited more sensation on both ends, "Shit! I'm gonna cum again." She yelled and dug her hands into the pillow under her head. With one last thrust Nick pushed himself deep into her, she screamed out in ecstasy, he softly bounced on his tippy toes as the head of his dick created friction against her walls and he finally exploded and cum gushed out of him. Nick let her legs fall from his grip and he sank down onto her body, resting his head on her soft breasts. Both of their bodies were slick and drenched in sweat, they struggled to catch their breath but still managed to exchange small, tender kisses.

Nick lay on his back, feeling exhausted. Amanda pulled the condom off for him and tossed into the nearby wastebasket. She planted tender kisses on his chest, closed her eyes, and inhaled him deeply. She realized she finally was going to get what she wanted – cuddled up in Nick's arms, in his bed on the verge of sleep. He lay there holding her and rubbing circles onto the small of her back. She felt him pull away, "I need water, want some?"

"Sure" she quietly mumbled, immediately feeling abandoned. She watched him leave the room, anger and hurt overtook her body. Amanda got up and started collecting her clothes, she had her bra and panties on by the time he came back to the room.

"What are you doing?" he asked handing her a glass of water.

"Getting dressed, Nick. Don't act clueless." She rolled her eyes at him.

"Why are you getting dressed, is what I meant."

"We fucked so now it's time to go home." She pulled her top over her head.

"Why do you have to go? Stay the night." He moved her hair from her neck and planted a kiss that burned into her skin.

"You never stayed the night." She shot back.

"Amanda, please stay with me?" he pulled her back down to the bed and engaged her in a tongue-twisting kiss.

She barely nodded her head before she let him pull off her top and her bra. She lay down next to him and ran her hand the length of his torso.

"Why do you leave after we have sex?" she asked so quietly he barely heard her.

Nick brushed her bangs away from her face and kissed her forehead, "I had to come home to Zara and I guess, I thought, it would be too intimate to stick around after".

"Then why are you asking me to stay?" she prodded nervously.

"Well I don't have Zara to rush home to tonight. And tonight was amazing, I'm not ready to let you go".

He felt her kiss his chest again, "What are we doing, Nick? It was only supposed to be one time…" she trailed off.

"Shhh, no te preocupes, dormirse de" (don't worry, go to sleep)

After several minutes, Amanda felt Nick drifting off to sleep and she let herself succumb to her own slumber.

The next morning, she woke up still feeling his arms wrapped around her and his body pressed into hers. She didn't move for fear of waking him up, for the next hour she relaxed into his body and listened to him sleep. She used that time to contemplate her next move with this man, sadness seeped into her, as she knew what she had to do.

She broke from her thoughts as felt him shift slightly, "good morning" he said with a kiss to her hair. He pulled her knee up to his hips and let his hardness poke her thigh. "How did you sleep?"

"Better than I have in a long time."

She looked up at Nick and he kissed her lips tenderly, "Last night was amazing". He kissed her again on different parts of her face. He felt her hand rub over his lower abdomen; he put his hand over hers and guided her down to his morning wood. He guided her hand up the length of his shaft and squeezed her hand over his dick.

"Nick…we have to stop doing this…" she whispered.

He turned on his side to kiss her neck; "I know…" he sucked on her collarbone knowing he would leave a mark, his mark on her.

"I should go…"

"No. One more time and I promise I'll back off…please?" he rubbed his hand across her belly and took her breasts in his mouth. When she didn't say anything he let his hand wonder down between her legs, she didn't stop him so he gently fingered her clit until he felt she was moist enough for him to enter. With his dick, he poked the opening of her pussy, "please?" he asked again.

Amanda bit down on her lip and nodded her head. Nick leaned over for a condom and quickly rolled it on himself before she could change her mind. He gently pushed himself inside her and scooted up higher to her hips. Each time he rocked into her his pelvis grinded onto her clit, he was dying to fuck her fast and hard but he kept control of himself. He didn't want this last time with her to feel like it careless fuck, he wanted to do her slowly and remember each face and every sound her body elicited. They were both lost in pleasure and sensuality, as he felt their orgasm building he allowed himself to feel her and feel for her. And as their bodies flowed for each other he realized she had always been more than just sex to him, he cared for her, he liked her a lot, and he looked forward to seeing and talking to her each day. He loved the cute faces she made, and the way she tried to act tough but he knew she needed someone to see through her tough exterior to the compassionate, beautiful soul that she was. He stayed on top of her, inside of her and grazed his lips against hers. They were lost in each other.

"Aye dios mío, Nicholas!"

Nick quickly looked back to the doorway of his room and his mind went numb, all he could say was "Ma".

But she turned away, as she made her way to the living room he heard her say "lo que está pasando? Usted todavía está casado" (What's happening? You're still married.)

Amanda pushed his chest to get him to move, he stared at her with a blank look.


	10. Chapter 10

Amanda pushed on his chest again and tried to wriggle out from under him, "Nick, you're heavy" she pushed him a third time before he realized he wasn't holding up his weight.

"Sorry" he murmured as he rolled onto his side, letting her slide out from under him. He heard his front door close and knew he mother had left. Amanda quickly searched for her clothes; he sat up and watched her pull on her panties and jeans. She held her top in her hand; he stood up and handed the black bra to her. "You don't have to leave".

"Yeah, I gotta run, get changed for work…" she avoided his gaze.

"Amanda…" he called after her but she rushed out of his house without so much as a thank you or a good bye.

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Nick sat at his desk and went over a case with Liv, he tried his best to listen to what she said, but his mind and eyes often drifted off to Amanda. He didn't like the way things ended earlier in the morning.

He excused himself when he saw her walk back toward the cribs and found her sitting on one of the bunks looking at her phone. "Amanda" he looked behind him to make sure no one followed, "hey I'm sorry about this morning…I had no idea my Mom would stop by."

"Don't worry about it" she avoided his eyes. "I never should have stayed the night".

"I enjoyed having you all night," he said as he grabbed her phone from her hand to force her to look at him, "I'm glad you stayed."

"Nick, look…no hard feelings alright. Last night we agreed it would be the last time, so whatever that was, it's over and done with. Tell your Mom it was a mistake - a one-time thing, and don't worry about me saying anything to anyone."

"It wasn't a mistake for me…" Nick looked at her with hurt in his eyes.

"Look, Amaro, nothing ever happened okay?" she grabbed her phone from him and walked back to the squad room.

He sat down on the bed she just vacated, she stung him, and it hurt. How was he supposed to go back to just being "Amaro and Rollins", he thought to himself?

He pulled his vibrating phone from his pocket to see a text from Maria, asking if he would be available to talk. He deleted her text, sat a few minutes longer to gather himself before he headed to the squad room.

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A few nights later, tension filled his house and now that Zara was playing in her room, he took the opportunity to apologize to his mother for what she had walked in on but she only shook her head in disappointment. She didn't respond with anything else so he stood in his kitchen watching her finish the dinner she spent the last two hours preparing. Pernil Relleno de Moros y Cristianos was her signature dish that also happened to be his favorite, he felt guilty, he didn't deserve to be served his favorite Cuban dish. But after several minutes of silence she asked, "Was that la rubia from work?"

"Si", he admitted, "Lo siento mama, nunca quise que vaya en este largo." (I'm sorry, I never meant for it to go on this long.)

"But it did, Nicky. I can't tell you what to do. You are grown and you knew what you were getting yourself into, especially with someone you work with. Pero ser un hombre y decirle a su esposa." (But be a man and tell your wife.)

He nodded his head and looked at his mother with apologetic eyes. Cesaria stopped cooking long enough to hug her son, "tú eres mi hijo, yo siempre te amaré , no importa lo que haces."(You're my son, I will always love you no matter what you do.)

"Te amo, Mama" (I love you, Mom)

"mi hermoso niño, te quiero más" (My beautiful boy, I love you more.) she kissed his cheek and patted his chest.

Nick heard his daughter coming running down the hallway in full speed; he put on a happy face when she came running into the kitchen asking him to polish her nails.

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Late that night, he called Maria. He knew it would be around 6am in Iraq and hoped she would be available to talk.

"Nick?" she answered, "is everything okay?"

"Yes, I just needed to talk to you"

"Okay, it's late for you…why are you still up?"

"Maria…I have a lot on my mind, there's something I need to get off my chest."

She paused and waited for him to continue, when he didn't she said "You're scaring me…"

"…Maria" Nick sat up on his bed and took a deep breath, "…I did-"

"Nick, I'm sorry" she cut him off "I don't know how it happened and I'm sorry you had to find out through someone else. I tried to tell you before but you've been so damn hard to get ahold of." She sobbed deep from her chest. Nick was confused, what was she apologizing about? He was the one who needed to apologize. He opened his mouth to ask her but stopped when she cried louder, "I'm so sorry. I love you, Nick. I ended it, I swear! I asked to be moved to another unit and I haven't talked to him since I ended it."

"You had sex with someone else?" he asked feeling light-headed. He had his suspicions and that ugly gut feeling but hearing it straight from her had much more impact than he contemplated.

"I didn't love him. Please forgive me? I love you, it's always been you, Nicky." She continued to sob into the phone as he tried to gather his thoughts.

"Maria…I don't know what to say…"

"Nick!" she screamed into his ear, "please don't shut me out. I need you, you know what it's like here…I need you and I need our daughter. I promise, I will stay home and put you guys first."

He took a deep breath, his heart was pounding so loud, and his mouth had gone dry. "Maria, I called to tell you…"

"What Nick? Tell me."

"…the last several months have been hard for us and…I never thought we would come to this…Maria, I've been unfaithful to you, our marriage, our family."

"What?" she asked with a mixture of confusion and anger, "you cheated on me?"

"We've cheated on each other. I never thought it with happen, I tried to resist her but I was weak, I gave in and pursued her."

"Who, Nick?" anger was apparent in her voice.

"Does it matter?"

"Who the hell did you fuck around with?"

"Maria, it doesn't matter. It's probably best if we leave the other people out of it. What matters is if we're willing to forgive each other."

"Forgive? I don't know if I could forgive you…you fucked another woman while I'm out here in Iraq! Trying to survive and fight a war… and protect our country!"

"Turn the table, Maria! You fucked around, too! We're both fighting a war and we were supposed to have each other's backs. We both messed up, so don't put it all on me! I fucked her only after I knew you were ridin' some other dick!"

"So you did it as payback?!"

"No."

"Then why? What made sleep with her?" She asked through sobs.

"None of that matters…"

"It matters to me. Why? You at least owe me that."

"She was… here, she accepts my job, she made me feel different…"

"Your job? Was that the reason? Nick, I accepted your job, I told you I supported your move to NYPD."

"You said it but you never showed it. I knew you hated it when I didn't reenlist. I saw the look in your eyes, Maria. You were embarrassed when you had to tell people I worked for NYPD."

"Do you love her?" Maria asked with a shaky voice.

"I care about her."

"Do you _love_ her?" she asked again with a more firm voice.

"I don't know." He snapped, "Do you love that guy?"

"No! I didn't even like him. I only had sex with him because I needed to feel something other than the harsh war!"

Nick wasn't sure which should hurt more, the fact that she slept with a random solider or if she would have fallen in love with him.

"Who told you? How long have you known?"

"I suspected it, tonight you confirmed it for me." He snapped at her.

Maria took a deep breath, "How long were you fucking her?"

"About two months."

"I knew that's why you were so distant, that's why you were avoiding me…" she said more to herself than to him.

"I don't want to play the blame game. We need to figure out what to do about our marriage…"

"Are you even sorry?"

Nick took several seconds to answer, he thought of the way Amanda made him feel, the way he hair smelled, how he felt when he touched her or when he heard her laughter. "…I don't know…"

"I have to go…I love you but I need time to think about all this. I'll call you later tonight. I love you."

Nick hung up without saying anything. He wiped the tears from his eyes and stared back at the framed family photo on his nightstand. In the photo, Zara was about a month old. Tears streamed down his face as he remembered the day Maria told him she was pregnant, when she delivered their daughter, he remembered feeling like the luckiest man in the world. He promised God, her parents and his mother that he would be the best husband and father he could possibly be. He laid back on his bed and buried his face in the pillow, he failed to be the best husband and in the process he hurt his wife, his mother, Amanda, and Zara.

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A few weeks had gone by since he and his wife revealed their indiscretions, together they agreed to try to make their marriage work and agreed things would get better once she was home. Trying to make it work meant he had to make himself available to her as much as he could, it meant trying to have a casual conversation about things other than Zara, and it especially meant him keeping as much distance from Rollins as he could.

He was relieved he and Rollins were able to behave like adults and not throw cheap shots at each other when they disagreed, which was becoming more often. Liv and Fin noticed it as well. Nick was doing his part as best as he could and Maria was already doing hers, she had no contact with that soldier and she stopped asking him who the other woman was. He feared if he told her it was one of his partners then he would have to transfer out of SVU, and he wasn't willing to do that.

Nick sat across from Liv typing the final additions on the most recent case they had closed. The two detectives were thankful for the slow day, it was August and 118°outside. The heat was humid, sweltering, and there was no end in sight to it. Amanda walked into the squad room and he was immediately distracted as he noticed her light pink top cling to her moist skin, she had her hair pulled up in a messy bun. His mind immediately went to the image of her riding him; he shook the image away and noticed her cheeks were bright red.

"Where's your partner?" Liv asked.

"Parking the car, I'm sweating like a prostitute during Sunday Mass." She fell into her chair and held her stomach.

"Amanda?" Liv spun her head around and gave her a shocked look.

"Well, it's hotter than two rats fucking in a wool sock! You go out there and pound the pavement like we just did and I promise you'll walk in here swearing, too!"

Nick chuckled as he walked to the fridge and grabbed a cold bottle of water. He handed it to Rollins; he noticed her body tense up when their fingers brushed and pulled his hand back when he felt how hot her skin was.

"Thanks" she said without meeting his eyes. "I feel like tearing these clothes off!"

"Just calm down, you'll cool off in a few minutes." He said in the dad voice he used with Zara.

Fin walked in looking like he could kill someone, "It feels fresh in here and like an inferno out there." He sat back in his chair and took off his button up shirt. "You feeling better, Rollins?"

She nodded her head before he made a big thing about her getting dizzy in the heat.

The four detectives continued talking about the weather; Amanda's head was starting to pound, she felt nauseous and faint. She cleared her throat, "If it's with y'all I'm gonna home." Three faces stared back at her awkwardly. "I need to go home."

Nick glanced at his watch, "I'll drop you off, it's on my way."

Amanda felt too weak to object, she drug her feet behind Nick to follow him to his truck. Once outside, he opened the door for her but she leaned against the truck and fell towards him. He quickly caught her and felt how hot her body still was; she apologized, he nodded and the urge to kiss her washed over him. He held his breath and desperately wanted to keep hold of her and never let go. She pulled back from him as he tried to help her into the truck. Nick turned the a/c up full blast and quietly drove away from the precinct, after several minutes he turned to look at her and noticed she was still sweating profusely. He reached over, grabbed her wrist to feel her pulse but she immediately jerked her hand away and shot him an angered look.

"Amanda, I think you have heat exhaustion."

"I'm fine. I just need to rest." Her eyes looked heavy lidded; she leaned forward and dry heaved.

"I'm gonna take you to the hospital, you don't look well."

"No hospital!" She shook her head in disagreement.

"Stop, just sip on the water please."

"Don't take me to a hospital. I'm be okay in a minute."

"Fine, but I'm taking you home with me until I know you're feeling better."

"Just take me home." She pulled her knees up to her chest and curled up against the passenger side door. He knew she wasn't feeling well because she offered little to no fight.

He got her into his house and sat her on the couch; luckily, he had left his thermostat on that morning. She was still sweating, he handed her the bottle and watched her drink more water. He reached down and pulled off her boots, surprisingly, she didn't resist, not even when he pulled her socks off. He reached for the button on her pants but before he could touch the button, she smacked his hand away.

"You need a cold bath…let me help you." She shook her head no.

"Now is not the time to be stubborn, let me help you and when you feel better you can tell me all the shit you want". He held her waist as he walked her to the tub; let her lean against the counter as he went to the bath to turn on the water.

She took off her own panties and bra and stepped into the tub but held onto his hands for support as she lowered herself into the cool water. He sat on the edge of the tub and watched her relax in the water.

She thought of the past few weeks and how hard she fought to get him out of her system. She had spent more time at a bar than her own apartment, she chain smoked cigarette after cigarette and ordered drink after drink until the bartender cut her off. She usually left the bar cussing out the bartender or with some guy she didn't know. She counted about seven different guys she went home with, well she only remembered seven of them. She went on all night gambling binges, racking up debts in the ten thousands, and it wasn't until she wound up getting punched and kicked in the gut that she realized none of what she had been doing was going to help her get over him. She had fallen for a married man. She cried the moments she was sober outside of work, she turned into someone she always said she would never be like. It hurt when she thought about the things her mama would say if she knew she had gotten involved with another woman's husband, her mama would laugh in her face.

Nick dipped a washcloth in the water and put it on her forehead. She looked like a scared, wounded bird. "Stop thinking whatever it is you're thinking." He felt her pulse and relief spread through his body now that it felt like it was returning to normal. "Don't worry you're pretty little head." She didn't stop him when he slowly washed her body, his touch was tender, she closed her eyes and thought back to the nights when he used touched her like that.

After she was beat up behind the bar, she felt like running to Nick, telling him that she needed him to hold her and make the reality of the ugly world fade away. But she resisted running to him, pissed at herself for wanting to lean on him. Amanda swore to herself she wouldn't ever get involved with a married man again, she took a big step and started going to GA meetings again. Partly because she wanted to stop gambling all together and partly because she knew, she had to stop and give herself time to pay off her debt.

"Nick" she said quietly as he began washing her hair, he tugged at it gently and kissed her now cool forehead. "Nick" she called his name again, a little louder this time.

"Shhh" he kissed her lips softly to quiet her, he ran his hand over her hips and left traces of burning embers on her skin. He noticed a few tears slip from the corners of her eyes, which he kissed away. Maria's question of his love for the other woman rang through his ears; he felt he could answer her now.

Nick lifted Amanda from the water and wrapped his robe around her wet body; he carried her to his unmade bed. He tried his best to dry her hair with a face towel and when he was finished, he noticed she was softly snoring. He slipped off his shoes, pulled off his damp dress shirt and slacks, and then lay down next to her. He laid there for hours listening to her sleep, holding her tight as his mind swam with thoughts; eventually he was able to fall asleep.

He woke when he felt her stir in his arms, blinked the sleep from his eyes, and glanced at the clock; 3:17 glowed in red lights. She stirred again and he slightly loosened his grip to allow her to turn onto her side. He pulled her back into his body and inhaled the familiar scent of her, he missed the way she smelled, and it made him softly kiss her ear and jaw line. She stretched her neck and he gently nipped at it before kissing her mouth, he welcomed her tongue and felt relief that she wanted to kiss him too. Nick kissed her slowly and tenderly while they took turns swirling their tongues together. Time felt suspended, he felt like he had been kissing her for hours and had no desire to stop. He wanted to savor the taste of her mouth and the feel of her lips on his.

Amanda let him pull open her robe and massage her body, taste her breasts, belly and thighs. He held her hands in his and flipped her over; he lifted her hips with one hand as he slid a pillow under her pelvis, caressed her butt cheeks in his hands, grabbed, biting, and kissing them. He kissed every spot on her back and rubbed her thighs and legs.

His touch was tantalizing and sent signals to her slickening core. She felt him put his whole weight on her back and squeeze her hands, she heard him tear open a condom before he gently pushed his way inside her lovely slice of heaven. He straddled her upper thighs between his own and rocked into her several times, Nick let go of her hands briefly to squeeze her butt cheeks down on his cock. He stopped after a few thrusts, as he was not yet ready to cum. He pulled out of her and noticed the condom slipped off, he threw it to the floor and guided her onto her back.

"Are you okay?" he asked tenderly.

"More than okay" she craned her neck up to meet his lips and allowed him to pull her up onto his lap; she helped him roll on another condom before she kissed his neck, sucking aggressively. He lifted her hips and she eased herself down onto his long, thick erection. Softly she bounced on him while he suckled on her breasts, her hair fell onto his face, and he held her hips to keep their thrusts tighter and shorter. He felt ready to burst as grunts arose out of his mouth, Amanda's head was tossed back in pleasure, her nails dug into his strong shoulders and screams escaped from deep within her gut. Both felt all thoughts and reasoning escape their minds as everything around them went numb, all they could feel was each other, their bodies began to spaz out as Nick took a firmer hold of Amanda's thighs and forced her to keep riding him hard, not letting up when he felt her crumble around him. He was stuck for more than half a minute in a pleasurable paradise; he fell back onto his bed as his volcano erupted inside her but still he continued to push up into her until her body was hanging limp over his and every last drop of him seeped into her.

He panted heavily as she lay on his chest, breathing rapidly. Nick pulled off the drenched condom, he noticed it was broken but just tossed it to the floor. He used the sheet to wipe himself off. Amanda lay flat on her back again; he wiped her thighs and the sweat from her body. He kissed her cool skin up to her ear and said, "again?"

"Yes" she giggled and reached down and pulled on his cock until it felt fully erected and then guided it inside her as he again gently, fully pushed his way into her. He kept his hips close to hers and grinding into her, their bodies were still keyed up from the last mind-blowing orgasm that it didn't take long to reach their peak again. Amanda came first again, Nick sat up on his knees and vigorously pounded into her, and he held onto her breasts in his hands and teased her nipples. Her body slightly lifted off the bed from his power, he pounded into her reckless and hard; his balls and thighs slapped into her recklessly and while it hurt his balls, it sent tumultuous sensations straight to his groin. The strong penetration sent Amanda over the edge yet again and moments later Nick burst in her again, he continued rocking into her until he felt completely drained of any cum.

Satisfied, he collapsed onto her body; she wrapped her legs around his waist and her arms around his back. If she could have it her way she wanted to stay suspended like this with him forever, at that moment she had never felt as close to anyone as she felt to him. Their breathing relaxed and they drifted off into a light slumber. He thought he heard his phone ringing far away.

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Maria exited the airport and quickly hailed a cab. On the way to her house she phoned Nick's Mom to ask her to hold onto Zara for a few extra hours, she wanted to surprise Nick and have some alone time with him. She hung up and kept smiling to herself, it had been fourteen long months since she last kissed her husband. She planned to shower and shave her legs. Nick would be frightened if he saw how hairy they were. She planned to put on a sexy dress, a little make-up, and do her hair. She would think of something to make for dinner, she wanted Zara to be home to have dinner with them. She figured Nick would see no harm in working up an appetite considering sex was his favorite sport.

Nick's Mom hung up with Maria and she immediately called Nick, wanting to let him know she would take Zara to school and to make sure he was home alone.

Maria unlocked the front door and dropped her bag in the entry way, she took in her home, looked around the room and noticed black boots on the side of the couch, she looked further and saw a light pink shirt and black slacks thrown on the floor. Her heart dropped to her gut as she made her way down the hall, she gasped as her eyes scanned the floor littered with Nick's clothes, a robe, used condoms, and condom wrappers. Her eyes went to the bed and she let out a small cry when she saw blonde hair spread over a pillow, her husbands tanned skin draped over the body that belonged to the blonde hair, pale legs and arms wrapped around Nick, the dark blue sheet partially covered his ass and the rest of their skin was exposed.

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**So…..what do you think? What do you think Maria's reaction will be? Leave or confront Nick and Amanda? Do you, as a reader, feel their marriage salvageable? Does it seem like Nick and Amanda love each other?**

**Hoping to wrap this story up with the next chapter. I have an idea for a one-shot.**


	11. Chapter 11

Maria stood in the doorway feeling gutted, unable to breathe. She felt such immense shock as she rapidly blinked her eyes several times and wished for the scene in front of her to be a delusion. Her head felt heavy, her heart was beating too fast; she heard a ringing in her ears and her feet felt like they were stuck in dried cement.

But no matter how many times she blinked, her husband stay perfectly still, draped between the legs of another woman, his arms wrapped around her, one of his hands locked with hers, and his head resting on her upper abdomen. His back rising with each breath he took. The woman's hand was in his hair, her breasts were completely exposed and rose and fell with each breath she took, her long blonde hair splayed over the pillow that her head rested on.

Maria walked into the kitchen, poured herself a glass of water, and slowly sipped on it as she noticed how shaky her hands were. _His hair has gotten so long, he usually kept it short after he joined SVU, SVU was a good career move for him. It had given their daughter the stability she needed, Nick was able to come home to her every night instead of a couple times a week like when he worked for Warrants and Narcotics. Blonde hair… her blonde hair laid out on __**my pillow**__, __**my sheets**__, those sheets that I had picked out the last time I had R&amp;R. Who was she anyway? And a white girl? Nick never looked twice at any woman, let alone a white one. Why with a white girl? Why, Nick? Why did you do this? We had agreed to start fresh, work things out… you broke our promise to each other… My heart feels so heavy. How could he do this to me and in our bed?!_

Maria threw her glass in the sink and let it shatter, tears streamed down her face. Her world had gone red; she rapidly made her way to their bedroom, kicked the door fully open, and kicked the side of the mattress. The pair stirred in their sleep and Maria kicked it again, she heard Nick murmur a name and the blonde-haired woman woke up with startled eyes, she shook Nick's shoulder.

"Get the hell out of my bed, you white bitch!" Maria loudly shouted.

Amanda woke up shocked she shook Nick's shoulders again and instinctively reached for her gun. "Maandaa…" he slowly opened his eyes then rose on one elbow as he noticed Maria seething before him.

"Maria?" he reached for the sheet to cover Amanda, and then quickly placed his hand over hers that held the gun.

"You mother fucker!" she shouted again and reached down for a pillow to throw at him. He rose from the bed to block the pillow, dodged the shoe she threw at him; he held one arm out to block the shoe as he gathered the sheet to further cover Amanda. "Get out of my bed! You're a fuckin' whore! Do you know he's married?!" Maria screamed and lunged herself at Amanda.

"Maria, stop!"

Maria fell partly on the bed; she thrashed her hands blindingly at Amanda hoping for some sort of contact. Nick pulled Maria away from Amanda, "Stop!"

"No, I'm gonna fuck this bitch up and then I'm going to kill you!"

Nick used his body to block Maria, "Stop, leave her out of this."

"Why are you protecting her, Nick?" she asked, her eyes full of tears.

Amanda wrapped the sheet around herself as she got up from the bed. Maria continued to flail her arms over Nick's shoulders, "That's right, bitch! Get your ass off my bed. He is my husband! He's mine!"

Nick held Maria by the shoulders to keep her away from Amanda, "Why are you protecting her?" Maria hugged Nick tightly; afraid to loosen her grip for fear that he would follow the blonde and leave her. "You're mine. I love you, Nick." Her cheeks were wet, tears fell rapidly from her face, she tried to wipe them away, but they fell too fast. Maria kissed him hard on his jaw, cheek, and nose. "You're mine." She cried out to him.

Frustrated, Nick pried Maria off him and yelled, "You need to calm down!"

"Don't tell me to calm to down! Tell me why you're protecting her?"

"I'm not gonna let you hurt her."

Maria stood quietly; she looked into Nick's eyes and saw anger mixed with worry. She realized her was looking at her with anger. "You son of a bitch!" She yelled, clenched her fist, and swung at him connecting with his jaw. He grabbed ahold of her wrist to keep her from hitting him; but she swung again and hit him on the chest. He then grabbed both her wrists with a tight grip.

"Don't hit him." Amanda warned as she came back into the room, her clothes in disarray.

"Then come here so I can hit you, whore!" Maria spat.

"Hey, this is between you and me. Leave her out of this." Nick yelled sternly.

"Who is she? Who are you?" she groaned through gritted teeth hoping for an answer from one of them.

"Leave her out of this…" Nick shook his head thinking about what a mess he was in; he looked down to gather his thoughts and realized he was still naked. Amanda had noticed as well, she handed him a pair of shorts and a shirt from his drawer.

"How does she know where your things are?" Maria cried loudly, she began sobbing, holding her face in her hands.

He turned to Amanda, "Will you give us a minute, please?"

She nodded her head, "I'm just gonna go." He nodded his head at her.

Nick turned his attention back to Maria and just as he was about to speak, he heard sirens followed by rapid pounding on his door. He quickly rushed to get to the door. Had someone called the police?

"Police! Open up before I knock the door down!"

As Nick came into the living room, Amanda opened the door and quickly identified herself.

"What's going on here, Detective Rollins?"

"Detective Nick Amaro, Manhattan SVU, this is my house." He extended his hand and the officer shook it.

The officer seemed to relax a little. "We got a call about a domestic disturbance of some sort, caller reported hearing shouting coming from your home, Detective."

"It's a personal matter…"

The Officer nodded his head, waiting for Nick to continue, "My wife came home from Iraq today and wasn't too happy to see Detective Rollins here."

"Where is your wife? Can I speak to her?" Nick nodded his head and directed him to the bedroom where Maria sat with her back against the wall, crying.

As the officer turned towards the bedroom, Liv came rushing into Nick's house, "Nick? Is everything okay? I heard your address over the radio."

"It's just a misunderstanding," he noticed Liv look over Amanda and then look over him as he answered. "Maria came home this morning and became upset when she saw Rollins here."

"Amanda, are you okay?" Liv asked with concern.

Amanda nodded her head, "Yeah, I just wanna head home. My presence isn't helping right now."

Nick moved closer to her and lightly ran his hand up and down her back. "Get some rest, I'll call you later…" She just nodded and pulled on her shoes.

"Maybe you should wait a few minutes until the officer sorts out the situation." Liv said authoritatively.

"What situation?" Nick defensively raised his voice.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?"

Nick followed her to the kitchen while Amanda continued with her shoes, "Nick… you can tell me this is none of my business, but what was Amanda doing at your house? It obviously looks like she slept here."

He clenched his jaw tightly a few times, as he thought about coming clean with Liv. "She slept here."

Liv gave his a surprised look, "Why?"

"She wasn't feeling well yesterday and I told her I was taking her to the hospital or to my house where I could watch after her. She had heat exhaustion, Liv."

"How did that turn into her sleeping here?"

"It got late, we both fell asleep." He shrugged his shoulder.

"And Maria came home and saw you two?"

He nodded, "I guess she just assumed things, she's upset, yelling, threatening Amanda, throwing things, and hitting me."

"Is there anything else I should know?" she asked cautiously.

He shook his head and turned his attention to the officer approaching Amanda. He and Liv looked on as he questioned her about what happened. When he was done, Liv approached him and identified herself.

"Well it seems your wife thinks you are having an affair with Detective Rollins, now I understand she's pretty upset right now. So I asked if there was somewhere else, she could stay until she calmed down enough to straighten out this situation with you. She has agreed to get a hotel room for a couple of days."

"That's probably best; I don't want our daughter to see her upset like that."

"I'm going to give you some information geared towards families readjusting back to everyday life with a soldier who has home from war."

"Thank you, Officer. We appreciate your help." Liv and Nick shook his hand.

"Happy to help, Detective. Don't worry about the paperwork unless you want to press charges against your wife for hitting you."

"No, that won't be necessary."

The officer helped Maria put her things into the back of his squad car and he drove her to a hotel. Liv offered to give Amanda a ride home but she insisted on walking, needing to clear her mind.

**Sorry for the short chapter but I wanted to post something for you guys because it has been a couple weeks. I had a hard time writing the discovery scene so I hope it comes off as realistic, let me know.**

**I appreciate all you who have been asking for an update. The next one won't take this long, I hope to have it up before Sunday.**

**Please review!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Ok I updated chapter 12, let me know what you think? I will for sure be writing more tomorrow.**

Nick sat across from her eating the dinner, his mind felt numb. He knew she was talking to him, telling him whatever gossip she recently heard of about their friends, her friends actually. He didn't care for gossip or her friends so he quietly tuned her out but nodded every few minutes to prevent her from nagging him about how he never listens to her. But the truth is, as much as he hated to admit it even to himself, he didn't care much for whatever she had to say. He checked the time on his watch…23 more minutes until I leave to pick up Zara, he thought to himself.

"Nick, are you even listening to me?" she asked with annoyance.

"Yeah…" he shot back with equal annoyance as he made his way over to the new kitchen in the new house she had picked out. He didn't really care for this house, he missed his home and he knew Zara missed it too. Sometimes when it was just them two, he would drive them out to their home and they'd walk aimlessly through each room. He shook the memory from his mind as he washed the few dishes that had collected in the sink.

Other thoughts crept into his mind, thoughts that usually appeared whenever he was alone with her, whenever he was driving, whenever he wasn't required to fully use his brain.

He quickly finished the dishes and called out on his way out the door, "gonna go get Zara." He quickly drove off before she could tag along. He drove to his mother's house questioning life, wondering if this is how it was supposed to be. Co-habituating with someone you no longer loved, someone you could barely stand to be around, someone you had to force yourself, the rare times you gave in, to have sex with, someone you never referred to when co-workers asked about the family. He lived in a house that he couldn't call his home, he was in a relationship that just went through the daily motions. Deep down he knew he had made the wrong choice when he had to pick between Amanda and Maria.

He needed a change…

He drove through traffic, the events from all those months ago came rushing back...

The day after Maria came home Liv had pretty much ordered Nick to take some time off to clear the air with his wife. Nick agreed without a fight. The sooner he could end things with Maria meant the sooner he could be with Amanda. He remembered going to Maria's hotel room, they argued, cried, and hurled insults filled with anger. Maria was devastated over his infidelity and Nick felt guilty for causing her so much pain, but hadn't she caused him much pain as well? Hours later he left the hotel with Maria's bags in his hands. She had threatened to tell IAB about him and Amanda, Nick felt cornered. He agreed to all her conditions, gave her anything she wanted as long as she kept Amanda out of their problems.

After he dropped Maria off at the house, he drove straight to Amanda's place; stood in the hall begging her to let him inside. Frannie stood on the other side of the door, barking profusely, as if she too, was begging Amanda to let him inside. Amanda gave in eventually and opened the door for him. Frannie jumped to him, standing on her hind legs and resting her paws on his chest until he gave her his complete attention. After a few minutes of loving on Frannie, she trotted off to her bowl of food. He was left standing in her doorway, Amanda's back facing him, her arms crossed, hair tousled, and eyes red and swollen. He walked up behind her and wrapped her in his arms, all he could say was "I'm sorry". She had nothing to say, she just stood there refusing to meet his eyes. He turned her body around so they were frame to frame and backed her into the wall; quiet tears escaped from his eyes, her cheeks were red from wiping her own tears. He rested his forehead against hers, pressed his body into hers, and held her hands in a tight grip. He was afraid to speak; a huge lump had formed in his throat. He knew that whatever he said would never make things right with her. Deep down he wanted Maria to tell on them just so the secret would be out, but he had to protect Amanda. He would always protect her, even now, she hated him, but he would still do anything to protect her. "Amanda, I want you." He managed to croak out; she said nothing as if she knew there was a 'but' coming. Before he could say anything more, she pushed him away and told him to go home to his wife. He clung to her, not wanting to let go because he knew he would never be able to hold her that close again. She pushed him away with more strength but still he had refused to let go. It was only until she pried his hands from her body and shoved him out the door, Frannie barking wildly the entire time that he broke down crying, sobbing loudly from the ache deep within his body, an ache that could not be reached by anyone other than Amanda. He knew whatever it was they had, a love affair or whatever it was, was now over.

A few weeks later, he and Maria signed papers for a new home, racked up a huge amount of debt as Maria bought a new bedroom and living room set. She told him she didn't want anything in her new home that Amanda had touched. And so she replaced the whole inside of the new house.

A horn blew loudly behind him; he looked up through the rearview mirror and noticed a car behind him. He had no idea how long he had been at that stop sign. He shook Amanda from his mind and headed toward his mother's house.

Amanda sat across from the dealer continually tapping the table hand after hand, loss after loss. Today she had driven to Brooklyn, away from Spanky's, her usual spot. She was in the hole nearly ten grand there and she knew if she showed up the guys would harass her for a payment. The server brought over another drink, and Amanda continued to drink Nick away. She damned herself for letting her feelings get involved and she damned him for charming her and for being so damn attractive.

She thought back to the last time he was at her place, as soon as she saw him she knew why he had come. She had been so cold and harsh with him but she was hurt, he had broken her heart so she pushed him out of her home, out of her life and had yet to say a single word to him since.

When Liv announced he would be transferring to Homicide as Sergeant it came as a shock to them all. The squad room was different without Nick, the first few weeks Liv and Fin walked around moping as if he had died. Amanda remembered feeling like her heart had dropped into her stomach. Was she that harsh to him that he felt they couldn't work together? That night the squad got together for some farewell drinks but she didn't go. She thought it was funny how their co-workers overlooked her new nonexistent relationship with Nick. They had gone from being friendly to one another, to fighting like cats and dogs, to humping like jack rabbits and now to nothing at all. They didn't speak to each other, not even the few times they had to share information when Homicide called SVU. He would just hand her his notes and walk away. Liv had a habit of trying to keep everyone together so she continually hosted dinner parties; the one time Nick showed up, she left just as he entered. She didn't want to be anywhere where Nick and Maria would be. She felt like if she saw Maria she would want to punch her in the face just because she was breathing.

But despite everything that went down, every molecule of her being still desperately wanted Nick and she hated it.

She continued to knock back drink after drink and by the time she knew it, she was up five grand. Glancing at her phone she noted the time and decided to head out, she had just enough time to shower and change before work.

Nick returned to the new house with his Princess Zara, he loved when she still let him carry her. Now that she had turned six she was trying to assert her independence and he wasn't taking it too well.

"Zara honey, are you hungry? I saved you some dinner."

"No thanks, Mommy. Abuela made dinner for me and Daddy."

"Did she?" Maria questioned, "You're Dad had dinner here. Did he eat again?"

"Don't question her" Nick shot with a stern voice, "I ate at my Mom's with Zara. If there's something you want to know, ask me. Not her."

"Why did you let her eat there? You knew I made dinner." Maria said with irritation.

"She's used to my Mom's cooking; it's not a big deal."

"I made dinner for you guys, it is a big deal to me!" she said with a raised voice.

"Zara get some pj's, it's time for your bath." Nick turned back to Maria after Zara went to her room. "You don't have to raise you voice in front of her."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I wouldn't want to upset your Princess, and I wouldn't want her to find out her Daddy is an asshole." Maria said through gritted teeth.

"Why don't you divorce me if I'm such an asshole? It would do us both a shitload of good." Nick walked away, grabbed a towel for Zara and turned on her bath water. Zara ran in just in time to pour the bubbles in the water. Nick attempted to help her get undress but she refused, insisting she could do it.

"Daddy, I don't need help with my bath, I can do it by myself."

"Ok."

"Go read your book or talk to Mommy."

"Zar, you know I can't leave you in here by yourself." He tried to reason with her.

"Then read your book in here but I don't need your help."

He gave in, sat on the chair, and waited for Zara to bring him the book he had been trying to read for the last three months. Amanda had asked him to read it; she had told him it was her favorite book. Once he got Zara situated in the bath he opened to the doggy-eared page and began reading _Tender is the Night. _A few paragraphs in, his mind wandered to Amanda, he loved the way her nose crinkled up when she laughed, he would purposely tickle her just to see her cute crinkled nose. He missed her, the curves of her body, the way her cheeks turned red when she was embarrassed or right before she was about to orgasm. He definitely missed her body, its taste, its softness, its scent but mostly he missed the feeling of holding her in his arms and listening to her breath once she fell asleep.

His phone rang and startled him from his thoughts, "Hey Liv".

"Hey, is it too late?"

"No, just supervising Zara's bath. What's up?"

"Just checking in, haven't heard from you in a few weeks…"

"Yeah, sorry about that. Homicide is keeping me busy."

"This weekend I'm having a dinner party, nothing special just some quality friend time. Do you think Maria would be okay with you two coming?"

"Um, yeah, I don't see why not…I'll be there."

"Great!"

Nick could sense her smile through the phone, "Will Fin and Amanda be there?"

"Fin said yes but Amanda hasn't given me a definite answer… I think she's dating someone on the down low."

"That's good for her." He mumbled through the sting of Liv's words.

"I'm not so sure he's good for her though; she comes in late and leaves early. She looks exhausted…I guess I'm concerned. I don't want to ask her about gambling either, I'm scared it would come out wrong and then she and I would be at odds again." Liv sighed, "I wish things were like they used to be. We miss you at SVU."

"Yeah, I miss SVU, too. Look I gotta go. Zara's turning into a raisin."

"Okay, I'll text you the details."

Nick shoved his phone back in his pocket and pulled Zara from the tub. His mind was racing with thoughts of Amanda with some other guy. He distracted himself with Zara, getting her into bed, her stuffed animals aligned perfectly next to her, and he read _Beauty and the Beast_ to her for the third night in a row.

Once he finished the story he went to get some clothes, he needed to shower and unwind away from Maria. He was surprised to see she was already in bed, lying on top of the comforter completely naked. He sat at the edge of the bed taking off his shoes.

"Hey handsome, come to bed already." She climbed up on her knees, draped her arms over his shoulders, and pushed her breasts into his back. She placed soft kisses on the back of his neck. He gently shrugged her off, grabbed a clean t-shirt and underwear without giving her a second look, "I need to shower", and left the room.

Standing under the hot water he thought back to a few nights after she had come home, he had laid down hoping to fall asleep before her but when she came to bed she tried to initiate sex, he pretended to be asleep. The next night she tried again, as embarrassing as it was to admit, he couldn't get hard. When she reached down to grab on him he guided her hand away, from his body, he didn't want her to touch him like that. He finger fucked her and after she came he rolled over and fell asleep. About a week later she straddled him in bed, attempting to dry hump him while he read Amanda's book. When he didn't react with enthusiasm, she called him out on it. He insisted he was tired and therefore unable to perform for her. When it happened again, she threw Amanda in his face. Frustrated with her, he decided to shut her up. He threw her back on the bed, sucked on her breasts while he stroked himself with enticing thoughts of Amanda. When he was hard enough he plunged himself into her, fucking her hard until he felt her walls tightening up and just before she was about to cum, he pulled out and came into a tissue.

And that's how their sex went the few times he gave in, usually he just fingered her and a couple times he let her give him head. As he got out of the shower and dried himself off, he knew none of that would happen tonight. Thinking Maria was asleep; he quietly got into bed and lay down. Maria had been waiting for him though, she reached over him, grabbed his penis and nibbled on his ear. Nick removed her hand, "I'm too full". He grabbed his pillow and went to sleep in the spare room.


	13. Chapter 13

**For those of you who don't know, I updated chapter 12. So if you didn't read all of 12 I suggest you go back and read it. Also, in the future I will just create new chapters for updates since some of you had let me know the update didn't appear in an email notification.**

"When we get to Olivia's do not leave me alone with any of them, I do not want you talking to her the entire time, and if that whore is there I absolutely do not want you talking to her or to even look at her. Stop at BevMo and pick up that wine I like, I don't like what Olivia is serving." She flipped open the visor mirror to check her make-up.

Nick cautiously stopped at the red light, "You don't even know what she's serving".

"I know I won't like it."

"I'm not stopping at the store. And I'm not one of your soldiers so stop giving me orders. I'll do whatever the hell I want." He said with obvious annoyance.

"Do you not remember the conditions you agreed to?" she glared at him through thin eyes.

"Screw your conditions; I never agreed to anything other than to stay with you for Zara."

"For Zara?" she questioned harshly.

"Look, Maria, just stop, okay? I don't want to fight with you. Can we just have a good time?"

"We'll finish this at home." She said in a sharp tone.

"If I go home," he mumbled to himself.

He pulled up to Liv's parking garage, grabbed the tiramisu from the backseat, and quickly made his way to the elevator, he jabbed the up arrow a few times before it opened. He stepped inside as he heard Maria cussing him out for not opening her door or waiting for her. As the elevator doors shut, he waved at her with a big grin. Apart of him felt happy when he was rude to her. He was relieved to have a few moments away from her. The doors to the elevator opened and he thought to himself, "I need a change" for the hundredth time that day. He lightly knocked on the door and she answered quickly.

"Nick!" She pulled him in for a hug as he kissed her cheek. "I'm so glad you made it." She squeezed him tighter, "Are you losing weight?"

"Ah, not intentionally." He quickly scanned the room for Amanda and felt disappointment when he didn't see her.

"I need to lose weight unintentionally, too. What's your secret?" she asked playfully.

Nick chuckled, "work-related stress and a wife".

"So does that mean there's thunder in paradise?" Fin chimed in as he hugged Nick.

"Thunder, lightning… damn hail storms, man." Fin and Liv laughed thinking Nick was just making light of his marriage.

"Hey, where is Maria?" Liv asked.

"She's on her way up." Just as the words left his mouth, they heard a knock on the door. Liv opened it and Maria walked in giving them all dirty looks.

"You're an asshole, Nick!" She hissed at him.

Nick ignored her and instead smiled at Liv and gave her a once over, "I've really missed you, Liv. You look good."

"I've miss you, too! Come give me a hand in the kitchen." He followed her and accepted the beer she handed him.

"So things aren't going too well?" she asked quietly.

He shook his head; glanced behind him to make sure Maria wasn't around, "Things are rough…"

She tried to give him encouraging words but stopped when Maria entered the kitchen.

"Olivia, can I help with anything?" she asked nicely.

Liv glanced at Nick before she gracefully turned down her offer. "Good, then I can steal my husband away from you." Maria wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her head on his chest.

"Fin, is the soccer game on?" Nick twisted away from Maria and joined Fin on the couch.

"Yup, USA is out, can you believe that shit?"

Nick shook his head and initiated a sports conversation that turned into a work conversation, knowing it would keep Maria away from him for a while.

Amanda drove herself to Liv's apartment, she felt anxious and wanted to turn the car around and go to where she would feel better. She hadn't shown up to any of Liv's dinner parties in the last few months, partly because she didn't want to run into Nick and his wife and also because she felt a sense of shame. She felt as if they would know she was back to her old ways and getting herself into trouble. She cursed herself for not bringing a date; it would have been easier to leave if she had brought someone. When Liv had mentioned that Nick would be there, she felt a rush of butterflies swarm inside her tummy and for a moment, she felt content. Even now, everything was warm and fuzzy for a moment, and then the anxiety set in again.

Her last memory of Nick in her apartment came rushing back to her, she knew from the moment he walked in that he wouldn't have anything good to say. He had tried so hard to reach her but she fought him off, he had broken her, she was furious with him, the lump in her throat prevented her from screaming at him, her emotions were beyond words and she could only pour out her hurt in the form of tears. Her tears spoke for her, but even in the midst of her pain, her heart still loved him, and her body still yearned for him. She shook him from her mind and continued walking toward Liv's door but stopped as soon as she saw Nick standing in the hall a few doors down, he looked stressed out; his hands were on his head as he paced further down the hall. She quickly noticed his underwear band peeking out above the waistline of his jeans, his t-shirt rose slightly above his underwear revealing a small amount of skin. She smiled to herself; he still looked adorable even when he appeared stressed.

Before she realized it, she was a few feet behind him. His chest quickly rose and fell, "Are you doing deep breaths?" She asked with an awkward expression.

"Yes" he answered without turning around.

She glanced back at Liv's door then asked, "Are you okay?"

"I'll be in right now, I just need a minute to calm down." Still he didn't turn around.

"Okay." She turned to walk away but stopped when he said her name with surprise.

"What?"

"I didn't realize it was you, sorry." He took a few steps closer to her.

"Don't worry about it." She continued to walk to Liv's door.

"Amanda, wait. Please?" She turned around with a blank look. "How are you?"

"I'm well."

Nick searched his brain for something else to say just to have a few more moments alone with her, "I'm glad you came".

"I won't stay long."

"I miss you."

Amanda met his gaze; he looked at her with dark, sincere, puppy dog eyes. She opened her mouth desperately wanting to tell him back, but "Thank you" was all that came out. She entered the apartment without knocking and left him standing in the hallway.

He leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes, wishing he could tell her what was on his mind. A few moments passed and the door swung open, he opened his eyes to see Maria standing with her hands on her hips. "Let's go."

He shoved past her, "No."

The remainder of the night played out as awkwardly as expected. He couldn't peel his eyes from Amanda, he could feel Maria shooting daggers at him with her eyes and Liv uncomfortably tried to keep the mood neutral, she and Fin attempted to make light conversation during dinner.

Amanda tried to think of an excuse to leave, Fin was helping Liv with the dishes; which left her in the living room sitting across from Nick and Maria; she couldn't take seeing Maria hang all over Nick and trying to give him kisses on his face and hands. She knew they both were drinking a lot and if she stayed, things would get ugly.

Amanda went into the kitchen, leaned against the counter, "Thanks for having me over tonight. I should get going though."

"Already?" Liv asked.

"Yeah, I left Frannie with my neighbor and I told her I wouldn't be out late." She shrugged her shoulders.

Liv accepted her excusing, knowing she was lying. She could tell Amanda felt uncomfortable around Nick and Maria. But she doubted either of them would ever say why. She and Fin walked her out and then sat down across from Nick and Maria. She and Fin told Maria stories about Nick to lighten the mood.

Eventually, Nick sauntered into Liv's guest room where she had hung up their light sweaters. He sat on the edge of the bed to give his head time to stop spinning. When it didn't stop spinning, he laid back on the bed, pulled his phone from his pocket and tried to call Amanda. He waited for what seemed like an eternity for her voice message, "Amanda… it's Nick. I'm a little drunk right now but I need you to know that you looked beautiful tonight. I've had a lot on my mind lately, mostly thoughts of you… I really do miss you." He stayed quiet for a few moments, gathering his thoughts, "I'm gonna tell Liv about us or what we were… I don't know what we were… I guess… I'm gonna tell her what we did. I can't deal with anymore lies… I'm tired of lying, Amanda. I've been lying to Maria, to you, and mostly to myself. I don't want to lie anymore… Please call me back. I love you." He hung up and stared at his phone as if it would magically tell him the answers to all his problems. He shoved the phone back into his pocket as Liv slightly opened the door…


	14. Chapter 14

He sat at his desk trying to catch up on reports, the last few weeks had been hectic and calls were coming in at a steadier rate. He tried his best to stay focused on his cases, the more focused he was the quicker they could be solved seemed to be his most recent philosophy.

But today staying focused was hard to do; this morning when he glanced at his phone he took notice of the date, it had been 2 months since he had last seen Amanda at Liv's place. As hard as it had been, he pretty much accepted that she wanted nothing to do with him. Although a piece of him still hoped she would change her mind.

A month ago, he and Maria had signed divorce papers in front of their lawyers, agreed to joint custody, and his name was removed from the new house she was now solely responsible for. He didn't always understand her materialistic ways; like the reasoning for such a big house. But he accepted the fact that some things in life weren't meant to be understood. He and Zara felt right at home in their little 3 bedroom house.

Nick's mind went back to the night he told Liv about what had been going on with Amanda. She was so angry with him mainly because he had kept it from her. She told him they were partners for life and he should have been able to tell her anything, even if it was against regulations. Once she got over the initial shock and anger, she punched him and told him he was an asshole for cheating on his wife but she probably would have done the same thing if she had been married to Maria.

After he had come clean with Liv, he began to confide in her about Amanda his fears, insecurities and his love for her. When Amanda wouldn't return his calls or texts, Liv insisted that she just needed some time. Something inside him told him she was over him but he felt he could change her mind if she would just give him some of her time.

Amanda stepped into the elevator and jabbed the button with the orange glowing 6 on it, she took several deep breaths, wiped her sweaty palms on her jeans, somehow she had managed to avoid him for the last couple of months but now here she was riding the elevator up to his floor, feeling like she needed to puke. As the elevator doors opened she hoped he wouldn't be at his desk and she would be able to just drop the file off and run before anyone noticed her. She rounded the corner toward his desk and her mouth went dry, her legs felt like Jell-O when she saw him there typing away on his keyboard. His brow was furrowed and he bit down on his bottom lip in complete concentration. She smiled to herself at the adorable way he whisper read files when he was deeply focused on a case.

"Excuse me, can I help you?" a woman asked. Amanda thought she looked like a detective.

"Uh no, I found who I was looking for." She glanced at Nick who had yet to notice her.

"Him?" the female detective asked, pointing at Nick, "Amaro?"

Amanda nodded her head, his head shot up when he heard his name and they locked eyes. Neither was able to break their lock until the detective woman spoke up and moved closer to Nick. She ran her hand across his shoulders, "he's my crush." She smiled a big toothy grin at Nick. Nick stood up ignoring the other detective, "Amanda, hey…"

"Hi" she nervously waved, "I came to drop these off." She held out a few file folders. "Somehow they were mailed to SVU, I was in your neighborhood interviewing a witness so I figured I should drop them off to you…"

"I'm glad you did…" he glanced down at the seat beside his desk and quickly picked up stacks of files, "sorry, I have such a mess…sit down, please?"

Amanda glanced over his shoulder at the woman who stood beside him, "I'm actually on my way out. I just wanted to make sure you got these."

He took a step closer to her, "Can I walk you out, at least?"

Amanda nodded her head and Nick followed her to the elevator, it was an awkward silence while they waited for the doors to ding open. Nick glanced at her from the corner of his eye; he noticed she had lost some weight and her hair was much longer than before. In that moment he wanted nothing more than to hug her from behind and deeply inhale the scent of her hair.

They rode the elevator in silence, Nick was unsure of what to say. So many thoughts were swirling around; he didn't know where to start. He held the door open for her as they entered the parking garage.

"Well, it was good seeing you. Take care of yourself, Nick." She gave him a small wave and turned toward her car.

"Wait, Amanda…I know you don't have much time but please give me one minute, that's all I'm asking for."

"I'm not sure it's a good-"

"Just one minute, please?" he said cutting her off.

She crossed her arms, "What do you want?"

"Look, I've accepted that you don't want anything to do with me, I'll respect that." Amanda shook her head and turned her face away from him. "But I want you to know that I miss working with you, seeing you every day…your friendship." He stood a few feet from her, looking for some sort of reaction other than her unavailable stance. "Look at me, please."

Amanda nervously shifted her feet and quickly glanced at him before looking past his shoulder. Everything inside her told her to grab onto this man and never let him go, but he hurt her. She tried for so many months to think of what they had was just a sex fling and nothing more, but she had to stop lying to herself. It was much more than that, she loved Nick and even now, after all this time apart she still loved him. She could still hear his voice saying "I love you" when he left a message on her phone the night of Liv's last dinner party.

"Well, you don't seem to care. I'll let you be on your way." Amanda sat down in the driver's seat of her car. Nick held onto the door and just before he closed it he said, "Take care of yourself and I'm sorry it had to come to this."

He watched her pull the car out in reverse and drive around the parking garage; she drove past him once more towards the exit. Nick headed back towards the building but stopped when he heard her call his name. Amanda reversed the car a few feet and Nick met her half ways.

She looked into his soft brown eyes, "I can give you some time. Come by my place later." She watched his mouth spread into his heart-melting boyish grin. She smiled back at him thinking to herself how beautiful he was.

Amanda quickly finished up her day in a few hours then rushed home to clean up her place and make it smell more like her than Frannie. She stopped at the market on her way home and bought a few items to fill her fridge. Nick always hated to see her fridge empty. She bought a small pack of his favorite beer and all the items she would need to make him dinner; fried chicken, smashed potatoes and collard greens, her southern specialty.

As she was gathering and preparing for Nick, she showered and decided that she would have sex with him tonight. She would forgive him, admit to loving him all along, and vow to live for him and their relationship. But the longer she stayed in the shower the more she began to think or overthink. She was dressing in front of her mirror when it hit her… what if Nick wasn't looking for a relationship? Who was that detective that said he was her crush? What if all he really did want was a friendship? What if he decided he didn't love her anymore and here she was already planning the rest of their life together? The buzz of her door brought her back to reality; she opened her door with a shaky hand and her smile wouldn't let her hide her happiness.

"Am I too late?" he asked with a charming smile.

"No, come in. Are you hungry? I made dinner." She took his jacket from him.

"Yes. It smells delicious."

They sat and exchanged small talk over dinner. Nick couldn't stop himself from picturing her out of her clothes, he still remembered exactly how she looked, how she felt, smelled and tasted. Amanda got up and made her way around the table, picking up dishes and empty bottles. He watched her stand in front of the fridge and bend over to reach for another round of beer. When she got closer to him he swiftly pulled her down onto his lap. She squealed with surprise at his spontaneous action. He gently tickled her torso before kissing the tip of her nose and brushing the hair from her face.

"Amanda, I really did love you and I'm sorry for not saying it then and for the decisions that I made. I'm sorry for hurting you, I don't know if you regret getting involved with me, but I don't regret a single moment with you. I never meant to hurt you. I need you to know that."

Amanda pulled his head to hers and met his lips with hers; they kissed lightly before she felt his hot breath on her neck, followed by his warm tongue tasting her neck and collar bone. Small moans escaped her mouth as she felt him bite into her neck and suck on the sensitive area. She felt him harden against her ass "Nick…" she moaned, "I don't regret you."

He stood up, carrying her from under her arms; she wrapped her legs around his waist and let out a small gasp when he backed her into the wall. He devoured her lips, jaw, neck and shoulders like a sex starved animal. It turned her on knowing how much he wanted her; it was as if she was irresistible to him. She felt him slide his hand under her blouse and cup her breast, he pinched her nipple. She helped him pull her blouse off; he pulled off her bra and caught her breast in his mouth suckling on her with desperate need. He stopped suddenly, looked deep into her eyes and whispered, "I love you." Amanda crashed her mouth into his neck, sucking on it vigorously. She heard him yelp from her intensity but she also felt him harden even more. She unwrapped her legs from his waist to loosen his slacks and free him from his "too tight for a hard dick" underwear. She dropped to her knees, pushed up his shirt and ran her hands over his hard body while his cock poked her neck and face. She teased the head by running it against her lips and giving it small pecks. Finally, she sucked on the head and he let out a deep groan like it was what he had been waiting for. She cupped his ass and pulled his cock deeper into her mouth. Nick loved feeling the inside of her hot mouth with his cock; he grabbed a fistful of her hair and guided her head back and forth over his extremely engorged cock.

Nick backed away from her, feeling like he would explode in her mouth if he let her continue. Amanda stood up to him, "I love you." She said into his mouth as she kissed him. Nick led her to her bed, laid her down gently before pulled off her pants and black lacy panties. He had her naked with wide spread legs, waiting for him to fill her with his love. He took a few moments to admire the beauty of the woman who owned his heart. He propped himself above her and gently guided himself deeper and deeper into her, with each thrust he promised her, "I'll always be here for you. I will do anything for you. I will keep you happy. I'll never stop loving you." Amanda took him all in, the pleasure was too intense, she couldn't respond to anything he was saying. All she could do was bite down on her lip between moans. She and Nick stared into each other eyes the entire time. Eventually she felt her body shake from the erupting pleasure, a few seconds later he breathing picked up, he thrust into her three more times, each time saying "I love you… I love you… love you." He groaned roughly and she felt hot liquid spill into her and onto her inner thighs.

Nick stayed propped on his elbows until their breathing evened out, he felt himself go soft inside Amanda but he couldn't bring himself to pull out of her. He nestled himself between her legs, interlocked both of his hands with hers and together they both drifted off into a restful slumber.

The end.

**I am very sorry for the long wait. Life has been hectic for me these last few months. But don't worry, I never once forgot about my readers or Rollaro.**

**I thank you all for your patience as well as for the requests for updates and the messages asking after my wellbeing.**

**I hope you all enjoyed this story and please let me know your thoughts on Temptations.**


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